The Ford Edge Makes Me Feel Okay About Our Enthusiast Future

"Swayze Train GTi" (swayzetrain) 10/12/2015 at 21:32 • Filed to: None

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The Edge was a very interesting experience for me, because it was the first time I’ve ever logged a large amount of miles behind the wheel of a car designed within the last decade. In fact, my ownership history reads like a “Best of the 90s” compilation: A 1996 BMW 740iL, a 1998 Oldsmobile Aurora, 1993 Mazda Miata, 1993 Corvette, and a 2003 Pontiac Grand Prix GT (disagree with me on that one if you must but I love it).

The thing is, the 90s weren’t as great as everyone says. Along with those few cars there were some moments (Lisa Frank, Pearl Jam, zip discs, Surge, a saxophone playing secretary banging president, and The Matrix), but overall us Americans were super coked-out on reckless consumption, things like Furbys, water filters, Starter jackets, and backwards jeans, their counterproductive nature offset by the number of them we could purchase. 87 Octane was just over a dollar a gallon, and the preferred poison of high displacement engines less effective in motivation than James Buchanan. Besides, why do you really care if your Suburban is just a truck with leather seats and cheap wood? You’re towing your Four Winns, and you’ve gotta make time to Torch Lake cause you forgot to bring Toy Story on VHS to quiet the children and their shitty little friends. Cars weren’t in the forefront of people’s minds enough for them to notice how horrible they were, because new neon distractions were around every corner, and using the internet to load an article about how shitty your Malibu was took longer than the car’s 0-60 time, the inevitable mid-race lower intake manifold gasket repair included.

I know you were already about to scroll just to post this

But the people who did buy good cars caused their neighbors to become covetous of well styled exteriors, individual pod gauges, wood from actual trees, magical engines capable of both making power and being efficient, and transmissions with more than four gears. This massive shift in consumer attitude couldn’t have come at a worse time for the Big Three, with the recession in the works. When people don’t have any money, they’re forced to realize they must spend it properly. And thus the age of automotive accountability came to be.

The Edge is a product of this newfound accountability. There are no rattles or squeaks, hardly any interior noise at all in fact, unless you turn on the nice stereo system, using voice commands and Bluetooth connectivity. The engine is perfectly sized for the car, a spritely and sophisticated 3.5 Cyclone V6 making around 285 horsepower. Even if a few too many of those horses have been eaten by the many differentials constituting the AWD system, it’s still a great engine.

Not my one, but very similar.

As far as the AWD is concerned, I haven’t been able to test it in winter yet, and I have no comparable vehicle to put it up against. But I can say that it feels proper to drive at moderate to quick speeds, the steering input is correct, but the feel isn’t. The electric system doesn’t pull back on center as consistently as a hydraulic one, and the limit is numb. It’s a bit of an unfortunate circumstance, considering the medium speed dynamics are deceptively confidence inspiring. If you’re in a hurry, you’ll find yourself understeering. The frustrating part is that you can’t tell it’s happening until you actually see it out your front window.

The only real complaint I have about it is the brake pedal. As I have learned ferrying many cars back and forth, ALL of them come with ridiculously light brake pedals. I’m not sure why they assume we’ve all got the leg strength of a small sized dog, but for someone like me, whose feet are used to carrying around 150 lbs all day, it often leads to undignified and convulsive stops.

For an average consumer who thinks they need AWD and actually does need a bit of space, this is a perfect vehicle. But I find myself torn between the attractions of its refinement and the bore of being resigned to this type of vehicle. It’s almost too easy, floating down to the road with large pillars to protect you from a crash, with not a whistle from the wind invading your insulated cabin, until your serenity is ruined by the reverse warning noise, endlessly activated by the bike rack on the rear.

I am glad about one very important thing, however. Back in the 90s, our regular cars were boring, cheap crap, built to the lowest standard to appease idiotic masses, sort of like if CarThrottle posts were actually automobiles. Despite this, enthusiasts remained accounted for. Attainable performance cars were everywhere, and many are still good machines that are even more affordable for their new owners today ( !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ).

And they say it’s not practical

Nowadays, our cars are still kind of boring, but they don’t feel cheap and crappy. Automakers are again focusing on making better and better cars, instead of the same cars that cost less to assemble now. But us enthusiasts are still catered to. We will always have our BRZs, our ST Fords, Porsches, Corvettes, Miatas, GTIs, and they will only get better. We’ll always have something like a C7 with MRC shocks to change from “comfortable” to “trackable” before you can say the word “pothole”, cylinder deactivation, and electronic exhaust valves so your neighbors don’t call the cops on you each morning.

At least, until they pass the Motor Law. Then you’ll find me at my uncle’s country place. Or at least you might, if anyone knew about it. No one does.

Under_Score > Swayze Train GTi 10/12/2015 at 21:45

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Starter? Isn’t that the Walmart brand of sports apparel?

Swayze Train GTi > Under_Score 10/12/2015 at 21:51

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I haven’t been in a Wal Mart in years, but I do remember those really shitty windbreakers with sports logos on them being a thing in the 90s. And the brand was Starter

Under_Score > Swayze Train GTi 10/12/2015 at 22:31

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Wow, Walmarts are everywhere and nationwide. When I was little, my shoes and clothes from Wal-Mart were called Athletic Works, and the logo was a Z. They changed over to Starter in like 2009, 2010, from Athletic Works. Dunno why though. Now I’m a brand snob, so I’ve owned very few pieces of Starter since the change over.

E92M3 > Swayze Train GTi 10/12/2015 at 22:43

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I remember kids stabbing and killing each other to get one of those stupid jackets.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > Under_Score 10/12/2015 at 22:50

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It was earlier than that. When I hear a reference to Starter this line from Eminem’s Stan runs through my mind

“and here’s an autograph for your brother,I wrote it on the Starter cap”

That song was released in 2000. However the Wal-mart exclusive sales did start more recently, couldn’t find an exact answer on the Wiki page tho.

Swayze Train GTi > E92M3 10/12/2015 at 22:54

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I had an Michigan State University one when I was a kid. Of course, I grew up in the most upper middle class neighborhood there ever has been, so not many stabbings.

TrickJos > Swayze Train GTi 10/13/2015 at 06:55

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It’s almost too easy

This is the exact thought on my mind when I drive a newer car. I don’t necessarily think it’s a bad thing, but I do enjoy the idiosyncrasies of a very used old car. Thankfully, I have an old and a new car so I get the best of both worlds.

BloodlessWeevil > Swayze Train GTi 10/13/2015 at 08:14

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“The electric system doesn’t pull back on center as consistently as a hydraulic one.”

Don’t go blaming the power steering system, it is actually a property of suspension geometry ( caster .)

Swayze Train GTi > BloodlessWeevil 10/13/2015 at 08:30

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Ah I was unaware, I just assumed it would be the steering system

You can tell a Finn but you can't tell him much > Swayze Train GTi 10/13/2015 at 09:35

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At least, until they pass the Motor Law. Then you’ll find me at my uncle’s country place. Or at least you might, if anyone knew about it. No one does.

Nick > Swayze Train GTi 10/13/2015 at 10:15

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I had one as a loner car while the dealer was doing some work on my fusion.

I couldn’t get out of that car fast enough. mine was barely equipped, slow as shit and everything felt cheap. No back up camera, which is pretty much standard, especially for a vehicle that size. It felt way too big for me, and the mileage sucked. the turn signal doesn’t stay up or down, which drives me nuts. it just pushes up, activates the blinker, and goes back to where it was. then the blinker wouldn’t turn off until you turned the vehicle. accidentally hit it while on the highway? tough shit. that sucker is staying on until you manage to turn. think you can just press the stalk in the opposite direction? NOPE! that just turns on the other blinker. the only good part for me was that the AC was ice cold. in July, that was very welcome.

it was a long week in that POS

wiffleballtony > Swayze Train GTi 10/13/2015 at 11:56

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Although I am risking some jalop cred, I do like the Edge Sport.

Swayze Train GTi > You can tell a Finn but you can't tell him much 10/13/2015 at 17:11

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I feel like such a wimp whenever this song is on, I always tear up a bit, for I know the day is coming when this song will be my life. Except I’ll probably be the white-haired uncle at that point.

Swayze Train GTi > Nick 10/13/2015 at 17:16

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I can imagine it being painfully slow with anything less than the 3.5L. Givne the height of the rear window, I’m not surprised you were hurting for a backup camera, mine has one and I’m quite glad.

As far as the indicators are concerned, you just have to slightly click it the other way to cancel. The new Fords have a two step stalk, where slightly pushing it gives 3 blinks to indicate lane change, and the full blink until turned that you mentioned. If you push it slightly back it will cancel, or at the worse it will just give a short 3 blinks for the other way.

I do agree on the size though. It feels a lot bigger than it should. I was in 2015 Tahoe today and it felt roughly the same size

Swayze Train GTi > wiffleballtony 10/13/2015 at 17:25

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Neighbor of mine has one, and it’s quite a nice looking car. I especially like the wheels they put on it

Nick > Swayze Train GTi 10/14/2015 at 11:51

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i tried pushing it in the other direction. maybe it was broken, but it didn’t cancel it. it just activated the opposite one.

unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) > Swayze Train GTi 10/15/2015 at 22:37

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The E38 is so 90s that mine has a tape deck and 6 CD changer. The damn car screams 90s when you sit in it.

Swayze Train GTi > unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) 10/15/2015 at 22:42

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And the pointless little LEDS in the odometer that always went bad so you only just had a rough idea of what your mileage was, the instant economy gauge that only went down to 8, so 90s.

OH DOES YOURS HAVE THE CAR PHONE?! SEWWWW NEIN TEES

unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) > Swayze Train GTi 10/16/2015 at 00:16

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I have the 90s yuppie phone. I need to blast Radiohead’s OK Computer to make it super 90s. The cluster thing is a signature BMW thing, you can send them out for repair or solder them yourself, I can sort of read the odometer, so I don’t care really.

Swayze Train GTi > unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) 10/16/2015 at 00:27

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Yeah, I remember the process of figuring out what the mileage was with whatever lights were working. And then a number would click over and you’d find out you were off by a thousand or few

The Powershift in Steve's '12 Ford Focus killed it's TCM (under warranty!) > Nick 10/22/2015 at 14:47

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the turn signal doesn’t stay up or down, which drives me nuts. it just pushes up, activates the blinker, and goes back to where it was. then the blinker wouldn’t turn off until you turned the vehicle. accidentally hit it while on the highway? tough shit. that sucker is staying on until you manage to turn. think you can just press the stalk in the opposite direction? NOPE! that just turns on the other blinker.

My wife has a 2013, and every time I drive it I wind up cursing the turn signal stalks to the depths of hell for all of those reasons. We’re not the only ones who hated it though - my friend recently leased a 2016 and it has the same turn signal stalks as my Focus, which are excellent. I guess enough people complained that Ford had the engineers swap parts during the redesign.

The Powershift in Steve's '12 Ford Focus killed it's TCM (under warranty!) > Swayze Train GTi 10/22/2015 at 14:53

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My wife has a 2013. Apart from the turn signal stalks, it’s pretty nice vehicle. Competent is how I describe it - it’s quiet, smooth riding, fast enough, it has higher limits than you feel comfortable challenging in a mommy mobile, and as comfortable as a couch. It was fantastic driving from central NJ to visit my mother’s family in Charlotte, NC. It even knocked down 26 mpg (calculated at the pump) during the highway portions, and we took the hilly drive along I-81.

My grips? MyFordTouch sucks as bad as they say it does, though the voice commands somewhat make up for that. It’s very wide for how long it is, making it slightly challenging to park. I also despise the turn signal stalks, but that’s been fixed in the ‘16s, so I guess Ford got the memo.

The best part? I got it drifting in the snow last winter. Who knew something so big could slide so gracefully.

Swayze Train GTi > The Powershift in Steve's '12 Ford Focus killed it's TCM (under warranty!) 10/22/2015 at 16:44

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I wouldn’t know about the My Ford Touch, my car doesn’t have it. But I agree, the voice commands work well once you’ve figured out it’s intricacies in command.

I like the signal stalk, it took just a bit of getting used to, and canceling it can be annoying, but once I got the hang of it it was fine.

I didn’t even consider the dorifto potential, I have the AWD version so I’ll have to give it a shot this winter. Up til now I was really bummed, cause I wouldn’t have anything to slide in, with the Vette in the garage and on summer tires.

The Powershift in Steve's '12 Ford Focus killed it's TCM (under warranty!) > Swayze Train GTi 10/22/2015 at 17:11

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I’m convinced there’s fun to found in any car, even 4200lb bricks like the Edge. The stability control gives you a short leash to tug on before it steps in and quashes the fun. Dial up the AWD power flow display on the gauge cluster, make a gentle turn, boot the gas, and watch all the power flow aft while you dial in some opposite lock. I found it pretty satisfying considering I’ve only driven FWD cars in the snow.

Swayze Train GTi > The Powershift in Steve's '12 Ford Focus killed it's TCM (under warranty!) 10/22/2015 at 17:24

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I spent a lot of time going sideways in the middle of the night last winter with my Miata. It could only handle 1-3 inches of snow, but when there was just a light dusting it was magic.