"Reigntastic" (reigntastic)
09/04/2014 at 13:29 • Filed to: EL_ULY, Cookie Monster
6
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"Reigntastic" (reigntastic)
09/04/2014 at 13:29 • Filed to: EL_ULY, Cookie Monster | 6
| 16 |
I seriously need to meet this warrior goddess.
For Sweden
> Reigntastic
09/04/2014 at 13:34 |
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I hear she's a Ryan Newman fan though, so you have to decide if you can take the good with the bad.
Diesel
> Reigntastic
09/04/2014 at 13:39 |
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Q: Why are her lips blue?
A: She blew a smurf.
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Reigntastic
> For Sweden
09/04/2014 at 13:40 |
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Newman is so consistently average. I can deal with some misplaced NASCAR fandom, I suppose.
Team Stewart, myself. He just seems to be running down any competition lately.
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Reigntastic
> Diesel
09/04/2014 at 13:40 |
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From drinking the blood of her enemy.
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Diesel
> Reigntastic
09/04/2014 at 13:41 |
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Why did you mention blood? I still have that Diva cup article on my mind.
PS9
> Reigntastic
09/04/2014 at 13:44 |
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BEFORE EVERYONE PANICS: Understand that this is the natural order of things. Female Cookie Monsters - while very beautiful - are violent and deadly. They kill the mating partner after offspring are assured to come.
It isn't as bad as it was in the pre-cookie dough era, but the ritual still ends in a fatality. The MCMR (Male Cookie Monster Rights) Movement helped get the Bill of Sactity passed to protect Male Cookie Monsters from being murdered. They still have to die, but everything is voulentary now. They mate, wait until confirmation of pregnancy, and then the female painlessly euthanizes the male, who may or may not decide to hand his body over to her after death to do as she wishes with it. It's pretty clear here than ULY decided that his body belonged to his lover, and as a symbol of her undying love and devotion to him, she has removed his head, and placed it on a replica Count Slayer; A spike used by the cookie monster tribe to kill Count von Count in 37 B.C.D (Before Cookie Dough). It is considered a grand and overt gesture of honor to place the head of one's lover on a Count Slayer replica. I can assure you that many tears were shed by her, as she severed his head and slammed it into that spike.
I know this must be difficult for us to understand, but know that we are outsiders. As non-cookie craving beasts, it's not our place to judge the cultural mores and traditions the Cookie Monster Tribe lives by. Perhaps with more time and more exposure to other cultures, the Cookie Monster Tribe will abandon this gory and brutal practice, but for now, we must allow them to do as they wish.
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Diesel
> Reigntastic
09/04/2014 at 13:44 |
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He really has been killing it recently.
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For Sweden
> Reigntastic
09/04/2014 at 13:44 |
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Newman is the driver for the fan who wants an edgy driver but doesn't know what it means to be edgy. Biffle is the driver for the fan who likes consistently average results.
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Reigntastic
> Diesel
09/04/2014 at 13:44 |
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The menstrual cycle is an important and beautiful part of reproduction, you cis/male privileged/misogynistic (pick one) scum! Tampons are rape!
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Reigntastic
> For Sweden
09/04/2014 at 13:45 |
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3edgy5me
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Diesel
> Reigntastic
09/04/2014 at 13:46 |
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http://jezebel.com/broccoli-stenc…
I prefer misogynistic. It's like an asshole that only hates women that speak. I can live with that.
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Reigntastic
> PS9
09/04/2014 at 13:47 |
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For Sweden
> Reigntastic
09/04/2014 at 13:47 |
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31edgy16me
unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins)
> Reigntastic
09/04/2014 at 13:47 |
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Should have posted this on jezebel, I heard they have women's rights Wednesdays.
EL_ULY
> Reigntastic
09/04/2014 at 14:18 |
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LOL!!!!!!!!!
zeontestpilot
> PS9
09/04/2014 at 14:49 |
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That. Was. Beautiful.