6 Months in: my first BMW experience

"phenotyp" (phenotyp) 07/01/2014 at 16:38 • Filed to: reviews, bmw, e60

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[Full disclosure: BMW gives absolutely zero fucks about me owning this car. None whatsoever.

All exterior photos are mine, but the interior shots are both mine and the google's]

So last year I became a dad. Which meant that I needed a grown-up car. An MR2 simply will not baby. So after 8 1/2 years of driving this:

I had to saddle up and find something that would accommodate the baby seat and accompanying accoutrement. My criteria were pretty simple: RWD, manual preferred, doesn't make me feel like I've completely given up. Did not want AWD, nor turbo anything. Also, having designed cars, finding one I like the looks of is waaaaay harder than it should be. I found a few !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! cars, but made the mistake of driving a 5-series pretty early on in my search, and quickly came to the conclusion that, thanks to the depreciation hit that others who'd come before me had already taken, I'd narrow my search to 528s. Found a couple. One that I drove home, and quickly discovered was leaking from the fuel tank. Another that ticked the right boxes: black, black interior, good warranty... and the same price as this 550 that had the same miles, cleaner inside and out, more toys, and a whole lot more power. Done. So I went from one much-derided design to possibly the most-derided. Let the haters hate.

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This 2007 BMW 550i had 89,000 miles on it when I bought it in November. I'm the third owner, and I've put almost 4,000 miles on it since. After the MR2, it's like going from the F-18 to driving the goddamn aircraft carrier.

Exterior 8/10

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've all heard the same bullshit about the E60's exterior design. And you know what? They're wrong. Sure, on the wrong wheels and suspension (lookin at you, 528...) it's a little too light on its feet, like a hippo wearing ballet slippers. But the 550, with bigger wheels, meaner rubber, and sport suspension, it looks extremely purposeful, powerful, and grounded to the ground. Everyone shat on the E60 when it debuted, and, yeah, it was pretty shocking. I was still in design school when it dropped, and the only thing I could really say about it then was that it had the most beautiful bodyside section of any production car. And I still stand by that. The drape from the break of the concave shoulder to the fillet at the bottom of the doors is gorgeous. In 2003, it looked bloated, too tall compared to the E39, and I didn't understand the headlights. Now, with the benefit of experience and the intervening years, BMW's design team was prescient, weren't they? They were designing ahead of regulations and requirements that would similarly influence all production cars in the coming years. Today, it looks almost restrained compared to the convoluted, tortured sheetmetal coming out of companies like Nissan and Hyundai. I could go on at some length about what I like about the exterior. It looks best in darker metallics, I think, but the silver's grown on me. The 2008 LCI (BMW-speak for refresh) brought cooler taillights, nicer wheels, and some other stuff, but the basic shape stayed the same. I don't love-love it, but I respect the hell out of it. I'm not the !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! .

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Interior 7/10

(not my photo)

The interior looks best at night, and unfortunately I haven't taken any pictures of that. The subtle ambient lighting is wonderful. The orange instrument lights are a richer, deeper orange than that in the MR2. With the sport package come the 20-way power/memory seats, which I have to say are the most comfortable seats of any type, automotive or not, that I have ever sat in. Seriously. They are insanely comfortable. And the bolsters inflate and hug you when you start the car. The only thing they're missing is ventilation, which would definitely be welcome in central Texas. I'm sure the new ones have that. The heat distribution is adjustable. The controls are all right where you want them to be, and feel solid and appropriately-weighted. The steering wheel is fat and grippy. You can program the steering wheel's buttons. The leather, although not as nice as the black or saddle colors, is primo, the stitching perfect. The back seat feels like a business jet. It's huge, and that middle seatback folds down for a big armrest/console/cupholder/card table combo. I've been in airplanes that weren't as nicely put together. After 8+ years in a mid-engined convertible, it's crazy quiet, hugely spacious, and feels like an armored car.

2007 was the last year for the dildo shifter, as 2008 brought in the now-BMW-ubiquitous lozenge shifter, as well as updates to the iDrive system. Having driven both, I much prefer the more conventional, earlier shifter when shifting in manual mode. It feels great, and is perfectly sized and positioned.

What knocks the interior is the dash and door trim; I think aluminum was an option, and that would have been much nicer than some shitty hydrographic faux-wood. That stuff sucks, especially on the grab handles on the door. Easily the biggest letdown of the interior. The cupholders are standard-issue pop-out-of-the-dash BMW fare, which means that they're likely to break. There's no pass-through to the trunk, which will really suck when the battery dies and you're locked out. There's also an inexplicable hinged compartment within the console compartment, and it's not like you could fit anything bigger than a couple of Bics (pens or lighters, but probably not both) beneath it. Which makes no sense. Cue the yo dawg.

But any shortcomings are, in my book, more than made up for by the insanely great seats, and the fact that you just feel fucking boss sitting behind the wheel.

Acceleration 8/10

(not my photo)

The N62 engine is a 4.8l Jekyll-and-Hyde monster. Below 2000 RPM, it's like , Be cool. I got this . Between 2-3K, it kind of groans, like it's asking you if you're really sure you want to do this. At about 3500, it goes full-on Hulk Mode, and absolutely rips up to the redline. It's rated at 360 HP and 360 lb/ft, which seem like conveniently round numbers. Whatever it is, it's a lot. Which all comes at the expense of fuel economy. It doesn't sound like much inside the car, but the noise changes from a technical-sounding drone at low revs up to quite a roar when it hits 3500 or so.

Braking 9/10

A car this big and heavy needs some serious stopping power, and this most certainly has it. The discs are bigger than the MR2's wheels. The pedal feels great, but that last little bit before you come to a complete stop can sometimes be a catch, because the amount of torque the idling engine's still pushing out fights you to the end. I haven't yet had to engage ABS, but I'm sure it works. Apparently for 2007 BMW added a bunch of additional things to go wrong, including:

Brake Fade Compensation. Brake fade occurs as the brakes heat up under hard use; a given degree of deceleration requires more pressure on the brake pedal. As brake temperature rises, this function automatically compensates by increasing the hydraulic pressure relative to pedal force.

Brake Standby. When the driver lifts off the accelerator pedal abruptly, DSC recognizes that sharp braking may be about to occur and applies just enough pressure in the brake system to snug up the pads against the rotors. Thus by the time the driver's foot reaches the brake pedal, the lag time normally resulting from bringing the pad to the rotor is eliminated, reducing stopping or deceleration distance.

Brake Drying. Acting on input from the rain sensor (an element of the standard rain-sensing windshield wipers), the pads are periodically brought up to the rotors – just enough to eliminate any film of water between pads and rotors, but not enough to cause a brake application.

Start-off Assistant. Briefly holds the vehicle when the brakes are released while stopped facing uphill. The driver can then start up without doing a ballet with the clutch, brake and accelerator (manual transmission) or rolling backward on a steep hill (automatic transmission).

Modulated ABS function. "Analogized" control of the DSC brake valves makes the anti-lockup function (ABS) smoother. Instead of simply being fully on or off, application and release of these valves are now modulated.

Seriously. Brake drying?

Ride 9/10

The suspension is front strut and rear multi-link, with DSC and active roll-control. It's very firm, very tight, but never seems to be upset by anything. It corners as flat as you'd expect. Compliant over rough roads, never harsh or crashy. Compared to, say, a mid-engined car that weighs half as much, it's really weird to me how quickly this car comes back down when going over quick crests or humps. There's no float-time.

Solid. Solid, solid, solid. There's no other word for it.

Handling 8/10

Again, for a car this big and heavy, it can really move. Compared to the 528s I drove before it, it's way more planted (thanks to the sport package), the steering is more direct, and the turn radius is surprisingly small thanks to the variable-ratio steering. Thanks to the active roll control, I think it shows less body roll on long sweeping turns than the MR2, which kinda blows my mind, considering how much taller and heavier it is. I know I keep qualifying everything with "for a car this big..." but, really, it's totally surprising to me. Not a small car. Drives like a much smaller car.

Gearbox 6/10

Yep, that's an automatic. You can pretend to shift it. Sometimes it still thinks it knows better than you, and shifts itself even when you're in "manual" mode. It's my first automatic in 20 years of driving, and it still weirds me out. That said, though, automatics have come a very long way since the 4-speed in my dad's Suburban. Did I want a real manual? Of course I did. Could I find one? Of course not.

The big thing about it, though? If you buy one, have someone reset the transmission's adaptive learning (and the engine's, while they're at it). Mine would shift super-abruptly from 2-3, but after the reset it was perfect, and forgot the PO's bad habits.

Audio 9/10

Hell's bells, does this thing have an insanely good audio system. Satellite radio, aux input, weather band (!), and 7-disc CD (one in dash, 6-disc magazine in the glove box). The only knock is that the older Bluetooth won't stream from my phone, but it has the aux jack, so who cares?

As far as the car's noises, the exhaust burbles like a Mustang at idle, and crackles on the overrun. Really can't ask for more than that.

Toys 8/10

This 550 has all the options except the radar cruise control and the IR head-up display. And, yes, the iDrive. Honestly, I think the people who bitched about it must have just been crotchety old farts, because I just don't think it's that bad. It's not quite as quick as I would like, and BMW's since fiddled with it, upgraded it, and added more physical buttons, but the depth of customization and control you have with it is just insane to me. The nav system uses real-time traffic info. You can adjust how the climate control distributes its efforts. Self-leveling lights. How long do you want the lights under the mirrors to stay on, sir? Comfort Access is BMW-talk for your car knowing that you're opening the door, so it'll unlock it for you, no wasting time pressing buttons like the proles. Coming from totally bare-bones cars, it's waaaaay more than I'm used to, and now I just sort of expect it.

Funny how that happens.

Value 4/10

This is the tough part. This car cost about 70 grand when new. I bought it for a whole lot less than that. Then I dropped a ton of money (and my warranty company hates me) replacing every single piece of plastic and rubber under the hood, two engine mounts, the AC drive belt, the spark plugs (twice), the thermostat, the tire pressure monitor brain, all 32 valve stem seals, valve covers and gaskets, lifters, coils, valley channel coolant pan gasket, and a bunch of shit I'm not remembering. Which took a long time. And cost a lot of money. Like, more than I paid for it in the first place. On a car that was only 6 years old. If I hadn't bought the warranty, I'd have been SOL.

But cosmetically it's like new, inside and out. After all the fixes, it's better than any car has any business being. So, there's that. It feels like it was milled, not welded. It has a ton of airbags, and I feel safe driving my daughter in it, which was, after all, the point. It goes like the space shuttle. And it looks like this at night:

Total: 76/100

Engine: 4.8l, 32v V-8 Power: 360 HP at 6,500 RPM/ 360 LB-FT at 3,400 RPM Transmission: Six Speed Manual or Six Speed Automatic (sadly the one that I got) 0-60 Time: 5.5 seconds Top Speed: 155 MPH, allegedly Drivetrain: Rear-Wheel Drive Curb Weight: roughly an aircraft carrier Seating: 5 people MPG: 15/23 EPA reported; I'm averaging 19.1 overall

MSRP: $17,000 as bought... About $70,000 when new.

Jagvar > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 16:48

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Excellent review. I'm going to go ahead and guess that you're a writer by trade.

phenotyp > Jagvar 07/01/2014 at 16:52

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You'd guess wrong. I used to design cars, but now I design other stuff .

But sometimes cars, too .

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 16:55

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I sold one of these to a guy, he traded an 01 911 for it and still paid 7k in cash. Good buyers are the best. It had the full M suspension, Magnaflow exhaust kit, carbon rear diffuser, possibly the coolest M sport wheels I've ever seen, and man those cooled seats. I was on the verge of buying it the following week and the dude comes in and buys it from me.

Garrett Davis > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 16:57

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Great write up. Was this another fine example of CarMax warranty rape? I love hearing those stories.

Also, god damn, the MR2's design has really held up over the years!

With a few minor tweaks (and LED lighting), this thing could have been announced this year and I'd believe it.

Sn210 > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 17:01

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did you replace all of those parts because they failed or because you felt they were proper maintenance items to have replaced under warranty? Just curious

phenotyp > Garrett Davis 07/01/2014 at 17:01

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Thanks! It's actually not a CarMax job— they're usually asking around $25K minimum for these. I bought a 3rd-party warranty through my credit union, and boy howdy, am I glad I did. It really sucks to buy a car and then have it languishing in a shop for 8 weeks.

Also, goddamn right. I'll defend that MR2 until my last breath.

BKRM3 > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 17:02

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Fun read. Perhaps this has inspired me to do a 15-month ownership review of my E90 M. I wonder if anyone would care about that. Doubtful.

phenotyp > Sn210 07/01/2014 at 17:04

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Turns out that the mechanic I took it to for the PPI didn't notice the fact that it was leaking like Edward Snowden.

Looked clean on the surface, but a total mess inside, and a whole lot of collateral damage from the leaks.

phenotyp > BKRM3 07/01/2014 at 17:05

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Eh, why not? I had a few responses when I asked if anyone would be interested in it, and I had finally taken a few non-potato photos of it, so I figured what the hell.

Sn210 > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 17:08

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ouch! Ps awesome write up. I enjoyed reading it since I'm pro-e60

phenotyp > Sn210 07/01/2014 at 17:14

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Thanks. I figured since I finally took a few non-potato photos of it, I might as well. Maybe someone else could learn from my mistakes...

AM3R > BKRM3 07/01/2014 at 17:14

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of course I would care about that.

I'm realizing that E9x M3's are actually pretty reliable totally suitable as a DD. They don't have any major issues besides the whole rod bearing debacle. LCI ZCP E90's are also finally falling into my budget for a second car.

AM3R > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 17:16

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I love my E90's interior at night. It just feels so classy!

And on the wood trim: I also didn't like it so I wrapped it on carbon fiber vinyl. Got bored of that and it's back to wood but I'm thinking about doing a brushed black aluminum.

phenotyp > AM3R 07/01/2014 at 17:19

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If I were gonna keep this thing real-long-term, I'd mill some real wood, and rip that plastic shit out. Another part of the reason it looks so much better at night.

But, yeah, that ambient lighting! Holy shit, it's so nice.

BKRM3 > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 17:24

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Haha yeah I guess that's the right attitude. Maybe I'll give it a shot. After all, I enjoyed reading yours!

AM3R > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 17:25

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You could always swap some trim from an E60 M5 in, although the center console would be tricky and may cause you to retrofit an SMG shift knob/boot.

Sad it's not a manual, but nonetheless still an awesome car!

phenotyp > AM3R 07/01/2014 at 17:27

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Yeah, there was one manual (and black) 550 up for auction when I was buying this one, but it got snapped up before it hit the floor. Still bummed about that.

BKRM3 > AM3R 07/01/2014 at 17:29

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Knock on wood, mine hasn't cost me a dime in unanticipated maintenance as a daily driver. (Although, I suspect something happened with the parking brake last week because it's acting a little oddly, so maybe that's the first "issue" - and also I'm completely ignoring the five figures worth of track related costs, but...uhh...that is done voluntarily...and awesomely =D)

Mine's an LCI, but not a ZCP. Hopefully that won't turn you off of the review when I get around to doing it. I feel like a proper E90 M review requires video.

Alex B > BKRM3 07/01/2014 at 17:55

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How did you get your M3?

Alex B > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 17:55

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Right on. My favorite modern 5 series.

BKRM3 > Alex B 07/01/2014 at 18:24

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I bought it off a guy in northern VA who listed it on m3post. I had been looking for 6 months and was about two days away from pulling the trigger on a 997 C2S in Ohio when the M listing popped up. Sent the dude a deposit the same day, sight unseen, then drove down with a friend to buy it the following weekend. Nothing like a 3 hour road trip home to celebrate your first M car.

Mercedes Streeter > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 18:53

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When it comes to the Germans I'm more of a Mercedes guy myself, but I have so much respect for BMW. They don't mess around...until it's time to slap the "M" badge onto something!

phenotyp > Mercedes Streeter 07/01/2014 at 19:09

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Mercedes until about 1992, for me. After that they lost their appeal. I just wish BMW didn't use such abysmally shitty plastics. Everyone I know with a BMW has had some serious leakage issues at some point, and my buddy's E92 M3 has broken both of its throttle body gears (because why wouldn't you make the gears that make the engine go out of plastic?).

Saracen > BKRM3 07/01/2014 at 20:03

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I would definitely want to read it.

AM3R > BKRM3 07/01/2014 at 20:24

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Trust me, I adore M3's. Yours not being a ZCP means nothing. I mean I drive a non sport 328i :D!

I mainly want ZCP because in my area they are the ones that tend to be manual and the M359's are gorgeous. I'd keep those on and buy a set of apex wheels for when I track it.

I'm glad it hasn't given you any trouble. I read through the "high mileage M3" post on an M3 forum and there's a guy with around 150k still going strong w/o major issues. And he has a DCT! They really do seem like reliable cars. Sure, I'll probably be spending a lot towards tires and the suspension but that'll all be for fun on the track!

AM3R > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 20:28

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I know the feeling. I ended up with an auto E90 after all the manuals in my area got bought up

PetarVN, GLI Guy, now with stupid power > phenotyp 07/01/2014 at 20:45

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Great write-up! now I want a manual 550i....

BKRM3 > AM3R 07/01/2014 at 21:04

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You have the right idea. Behold: the 6MT

and behold further the apex wheels:

Mine has almost 43k miles. Don't fear the S65. My first blackstone analysis was good and I'm doing my second (early for mileage but with 4 track days) in the next couple weeks. Rod bearing issue is a lot less scary than the IMS nightmare in the pre-997.2 cars.

phenotyp > PetarVN, GLI Guy, now with stupid power 07/01/2014 at 21:32

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Yeah, so did I...

AM3R > BKRM3 07/01/2014 at 22:37

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even fox red! Nice combo. Even the rod bearing issue isn't THAT bad.

I like the 17's. Much more suited for the track and so light! Might pick up a hypersilver squared set in 17x9 (because concave) for the 328i for now, and transfer them to the M3 if I get one. It's crazy how cheap they are too, just over a grand for some strong, light wheels.

Ever hear the phrase "strong, light, cheap. Pick two"? Apex arc-8's don't apply to that!

BKRM3 > AM3R 07/02/2014 at 07:04

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Thanks, I love the fox red. Best interior color they offered on the E9X I think!

My ARC-8s are 18x10 et25 square. Currently running 265 AD08s, but likely switching to 275 NT01s for my next tire. One tip for the 17 vs 18 decision, assuming fitment isn't an issue either way: it's much easier to find used track tire sets for 18" wheels. Can save $ on consumables that way! Plus if you're ever going to change the front calipers you'll likely run into clearance issues with 17s.

ChargerGirlMass > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 11:04

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My daughter (21 years old) just bought her first car recently, a 2007 328xi. I will admit that I have never driven a BMW in my life up to this point and always thought that BMW owners were a bunch of well, not very nice people. BUT I will say this. Her little BMW is pretty nice inside and it drives very nice. Handling is crisp and feels good and it has some decent acceleration. It's not going to being taking on my Vettes any time soon, but over all I am pretty impressed. The only thing I don't like is that BMW uses a non standard form factor for the stereo, so if I wanted to gift her a newer nav/backup camera/bluetooth double DIN aftermarket unit it will look stupid in the dash. Other than that, it's an impressive car.

phenotyp > ChargerGirlMass 07/02/2014 at 11:08

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I'd only driven a couple of BMWs before this, and I wasn't too keen on the stereotypes, either. I rolled my eyes at myself. But. I guess there's a reason they're always the benchmark in their respective classes— they really are that good. I just wish they used better compounds for their gaskets and seals, because those fuckers fail and fail big.

phenotyp > Alex B 07/02/2014 at 11:23

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One might even say the first modern 5-series.

Jonathan Harper > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 11:45

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Nice! I've always liked these. I agree about iDrive...anyone who complains just hasn't taken a moment to learn it. It's really not so complicated.

wabbalosthiskey > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 11:45

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Spot on .. I have the twin to yours but with black interior, and have had none of the mechanical issues you did. So far just had to replace the air filter. My fairly consistent BMW-owning experience has said that at 150-170k they start to need lots of maintenance items, but I also looked at lots of cars in the 90k area that you could tell had been used hard, not maintained, or had been sitting and would have many needs. Must come with the lease-and-return it types. Did you take it to the dealer or an independent to reset the adaptive learning for the transmission, and what did they charge do plug in and do it? Was at the top of my list to do when I bought it a year ago and still haven't gotten there.

phenotyp > Jonathan Harper 07/02/2014 at 11:50

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Not complicated, just... slower than one would like. But, hey, it's pre-iphone tech, what do you expect?

phenotyp > wabbalosthiskey 07/02/2014 at 11:57

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The reset was what convinced me to at least consider keeping the car after I went through the first round of major seal/gasket replacement. I had taken it to an independent guy's shop, at the recommendation of a friend with an E92 M3. The guy's an ex Ferrari and BMW dealer mechanic, really knows his shit. I just asked him to reset it while I was there, and since he'd just finished up nearly $10k worth of work, and was re-tuning the idle speed and mixture anyway, he just did it. The guy has a non-federalized show-and-display-tagged Diablo GT in his shop, among a ton of other serious Italians and Germans... I'd recommend taking it to someone like that, they'd probably do it while you got the oil changed.

intheDeedtheGlory > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 12:51

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I love it. I was considering a 550 myself last year when I picked up my 330xi. I didn't really need the extra room at the time and the 330 was too good a deal to pass up. I still wish I had the 550 though. You should look into a wrap for the interior trim, you can get some aluminum look 3M that is pretty good and make the car look miles better.

phenotyp > intheDeedtheGlory 07/02/2014 at 12:54

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Yeah, I've been thinking about some matte black vinyl to wrap it.

AM3R > BKRM3 07/02/2014 at 13:22

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Thanks for the tip! The 18's do look much better unless I aggressively lower my car. I won't be able to run such a tall setup. Fitment will be a struggle with a non M. 18x9.5 squared would be a good option. NT01's are great tires. The handling and grip with them is just amazing. A buddy has a set of 255's on his Cayman S and when he lets me drive it I'm blown away every time.

Evan, Pope Of Jalopnik by Self-Appointment > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 13:32

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Awesome, awesome write-up. More people should do this.

I don't care what anyone says, I think the E60 is one of the most beautiful sedans that's ever been made. It's aggressive, perfectly proportioned, and in proper form (like yours) is absolutely a sight to see. 550s are seriously fast, too bad you couldn't find one with a stick. Those are pretty rare.

Evan, Pope Of Jalopnik by Self-Appointment > BKRM3 07/02/2014 at 13:32

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You should do it!

phenotyp > Evan, Pope Of Jalopnik by Self-Appointment 07/02/2014 at 13:37

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Thanks! Manuals sure are tough to find. The guy I bought this from had someone at an auction in Houston, where there was a black, manual 550 coming down the line, but someone sniped it before it hit the floor. I'm pretty sure that something horrible happened to this car at some point, despite the clean Carfax... It's not really noticeable in person, but in the photos I took, some paint mismatch is definitely apparent. Still, it's a badass car, and I like it more than I like to admit.

People talk a lot about their cars (obviously), but I think it'd be great to know more about what it's like to buy and live with.

AlexioFlexio > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 14:30

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I have a 2008 535xi wagon with 120,000 miles on it. ... was feeling great about your review until you mentioned all the items you had fixed... I have not had any of those issues... which means I'm due for those issues.. maybe i should be looking at selling now. you've gotten me all scared!

phenotyp > AlexioFlexio 07/02/2014 at 14:40

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Yeah, well... Coincidentally, about 15 minutes ago the shop sent me an invoice for $1500 that they told me was covered when I authorized the work back in March. Gonna call em up and raise hell.

intheDeedtheGlory > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 14:56

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http://www.metrorestyling.com/3M-Scotchprint…

This is what I have on mine. If I didn't know that I glued it on I would think it was pretty nice, there's something tacky about using the vinyl (pun intended) on a BMW but the feeling goes away after a few days. Holds up to wear pretty well, the only part that has started to fade a bit is on my door panel where my knee rubs the entire time I drive. Ive had it for almost 18 months on the car. Anything is better than that uber gloss burled walnut crap, the plastic wood in my old Mountaineer looked better.

Evan, Pope Of Jalopnik by Self-Appointment > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 15:04

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Yeah it seems somehow all the manual cars that do come up were beat to hell, not sure why. But every time I ever find one, it seems to be a similar case.

I think it's a huge help to actually speak about your experience with a car, who knows who you might help with all the information.

phenotyp > intheDeedtheGlory 07/02/2014 at 15:07

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They've got a pretty decent-looking satin black... might have to order a sample. Thanks!

Tripper > BKRM3 07/02/2014 at 15:09

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I would care, I've only had mine for 8 months haha.

BKRM3 > Tripper 07/02/2014 at 15:31

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I think I'm going to do it. Borrowing a non-potato camera for this weekend. If the weather cooperates, that is. You have an E90 M3 also? There are a handful of us on here! Since you've had it for 8 months I assume you've tracked it several times by now, right? =P

brzedr1 > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 15:37

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I almost bought a 550 last year. It would have been the first car I paid for myself, and the 6-speed, bad bitch V8 BMW with plush seats was a far cry from the box springs of the 5-speed Civic Hybrid I drove as a teenager.

Then, as I drove the last few miles back to the dealer, an oil pressure warning came on... Paradise Lost.

Anyway. Excellent review. Thank you for the vicarious enjoyment.

phenotyp > brzedr1 07/02/2014 at 15:41

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Lucky that it happened at the dealer. My troubles started 3 weeks after I'd bought it.

Tripper > BKRM3 07/02/2014 at 16:45

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Yes 08 E90 here. I have not had the chance yet, but I definitely will. I'm not too far from NJMP. I bought it as soon as I stared a new job, my weekends are usually pretty stacked and I just got engaged. My best friend strapped a supercharger on his BRZ and started autocrossing this year and I have been helping him out. To be honest I'm closer to being on a track in the BRZ than I am in the M but I will definitely get there.

BKRM3 > Tripper 07/02/2014 at 16:52

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Awesome! Congratulations on the car/job/engagement! I'm about 60mi from NJMP, so I find myself doing most of my track days there. In fact, I did a little summary of the Thunderbolt one from April ( http://oppositelock.jalopnik.com/track-day-bro-… ). There are more recent/faster/better videos on my YT page from the June event if you're interested. You should join the BMW CCA if you aren't already a member. Both the NJ chapter and the Delaware Valley chapter are fantastic (my home chapter is DelVal but I do tonsssss of events with NJ). New Jersey has a great program coming up in October on NJMP Lightning that is specifically geared toward novices - even has slalom and skidpad time! Let me know if you have any questions. I'd be glad to give you my email, etc.

qbeezy > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 17:03

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your review makes a me want to do a 24 months review of my genesis coupe. I havec had the girl driving all across the Midwest in all four seasons. (really only one type of season in Michigan)

phenotyp > qbeezy 07/02/2014 at 17:26

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Ha, yeah, Michigan's like all four seasons every month, except for summer. You should do it!

intheDeedtheGlory > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 17:57

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Do it! Satin would be good, I would just avoid anything with a gloss because it will look scratched up very quickly.

phenotyp > intheDeedtheGlory 07/02/2014 at 19:39

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How hard was it to place? I tried doing vinyl on the pillars of the MR2 back before I replaced the top, but it was such a bitch to get down without bubbles that I gave up.

N51fanatic > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 19:41

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I like the E60, buddy of mine still daily's his 2004 530i. Only major malfunction was to replace a seat heat warmer. Nice writeup!

phenotyp > N51fanatic 07/02/2014 at 19:46

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Thanks! Finally took some pics with something better than a potato.

Dude must have a unicorn, only one little thing in 10 years.

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 21:43

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Can you imagine? My God, that would be an outstanding car. If it had the M-sport bits, it be a more reliable and accessible e60 M5

phenotyp > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 07/02/2014 at 22:44

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The dealer made me promise to buy it, if it came up, because he knew it wouldn't sell.

intheDeedtheGlory > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 22:46

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It was a bit of a pain to figure out how to do it but there are good DIYs on popular BMW forums, lots of people hate the wood. The hard part is just using a heat gun and stretching it out around corners. I did the rear door bits first to get the hang of it and then did the big dash swath last. Fun little project that took about 2-3 hours.

phenotyp > intheDeedtheGlory 07/02/2014 at 22:50

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Cool. I used a heat gun on the one I tried, but after reading the link you sent, I think it'll be better about placement than the stuff I tried.

Torque Affair > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 23:16

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Where did you buy the warranty? Seems like it's a necessity!

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 23:23

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did he want too much for it? Thats a bummer but if youre happy, im happy for you

phenotyp > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 07/02/2014 at 23:26

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Someone sniped it before it hit the floor. I'm happy enough with the one I got, though I still think about the one that got away.

As one does.

phenotyp > Torque Affair 07/02/2014 at 23:27

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My credit union. Definitely a necessity.

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > phenotyp 07/02/2014 at 23:35

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As the gangster poet T.I. once said, "Stop wishin and hatin on what you don't got, be happy fo what yo ass do got."

phenotyp > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 07/02/2014 at 23:36

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Hard to argue, that.

Matt Black > BKRM3 07/03/2014 at 04:59

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I would. PUT IT UP!!! :D

Tripper > BKRM3 07/03/2014 at 09:00

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Checked some of your videos, looks like fun not that I was expecting anything else. I'm not a member of the BMW CCA but I will sign up. If you want to shoot me your contact info that would be great. I would definitely be more apt to go out for a track day with some advice from someone who does it often.

BKRM3 > Tripper 07/03/2014 at 09:05

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Sweet! The CCA is cheap ($48/yr) and you get a sweet magazine in the mail every month. You can use my member number as a referral. Shoot me an email: Ben- brodgersesq@gmail

Vzwolf > BKRM3 07/03/2014 at 09:22

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I would love to hear about it. Almost bought one in 2011.

BKRM3 > Vzwolf 07/03/2014 at 09:27

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Awesome. Going to try to put something together this weekend!

PardonMyFlemish16 > BKRM3 07/04/2014 at 09:31

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Ummmm yea, if it will be as well written as this, go for it.

AlexioFlexio > phenotyp 07/04/2014 at 13:34

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You want to hear about coincidence?... My self leveling system went out last night. Unbeilievable

phenotyp > AlexioFlexio 07/04/2014 at 16:08

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Holy shit. That'll teach you to call it reliable.

TheHeavySetThinGuy > phenotyp 07/04/2014 at 17:48

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... Mine would shift super-abruptly from 2-3, but after the reset it was perfect...

I hope for your sake that it's not the beginning of Mechatronics failure. Those are the exact symptoms of a failing unit along with general slippage (usually between 2-3 or 3-4). I'm sure you know about the whole issue that BMW created by placing a "lifetime" branding on their transmission and differential fluids. As a result of this branding, the Mechatronics system begins to fail as the old fluid gums up the works and wears everything out prematurely. BMW will do you a solid by replacing the whole transmission for you in exchange for $8,000. Sometimes a reset helps things out in the short term, but in the long term, the problem is likely to resurface. The advice from a scorned E60 driver: Change the fluids as early as you can into ownership. Chances are they have NEVER been replaced... Especially since BMW doesn't offer this service for the E60. If you're mechanically inclined, get your tools out, part with $400 for fluid and filter, and get your favorite swear words ready as you'll be using them frequently. If you'd rather not DIY, take it to a reputable independent BMW tech and they should be able to accommodate this service. But just be warned: this MAY or MAY NOT fix the problem, but since new fluid is better than old fluid, it's still worth doing. In my case, it did not fix the problem and now I have a 4,000 pound paper weight in my garage. One that I barely trust to get me to the supermarket and back. Currently, I'm not in a position to get a new car (wrapping up my masters), so I'm saving it for trade-in for when I am ready. Hopefully you won't have these same experiences, but just know that hundreds if not thousands of others have. Unfortunately for me, this was my first BMW... it will also be my my last.

Jimmy Tango > phenotyp 09/04/2014 at 00:18

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Thanks for stop by my thread and this was the post prompt me to think about V8. Its crazy thought but I litteraly don't think I would own another 8+cylinder machine if I don't get one now (future new car likely err on fuel economy and I may go back to Taiwan one day which has the same if not more strict standard on gas guzzling cars)

I want to ask how do you acquire your warranty since I was looking at MaxCare but its gotten pretty expensive now.

phenotyp > Jimmy Tango 09/04/2014 at 00:26

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Yeah, BMW's plastic and rubber parts are absolute shit. The more you have, the more it will cost you. My warranty was through my credit union, rather than the one the dealer offered. It's not bumper to bumper, but it's supposed to cover all the engine and transmission stuff, which is why I went for it. Cost about 4 grand, but it's already paid for itself four times over.