This Is Why I Don't Dance

"PatBateman" (PatBateman)
04/13/2014 at 23:04 • Filed to: Spinelopnik

This is my spine after "getting jiggy with it" at an '80s party. I THOUGHT I just cracked my back. What I ACTUALLY did was give myself a herniated disc in my lower lumbar (L4, to be exact).

Why am I telling you this? A couple of reasons. I have an outpatient surgery tomorrow morning at the ass crack of dawn to repair said herniated disc. From what I've been told, it provides immediate relief to the pain that's been radiating down my leg. I'll be out of the office, laying on my back, for a couple of days. So you'll be seeing a lot more of me until Thursday or so.

Second (and most important) reason: I will be on pain medication, so I may be a little "loopy". If I make some comments that seem weird, this is why. I NEVER take pain meds, so I don't really know the exact frame of mind I'll be in. Prepare yourself.

So, in summary, I injured my back dancing like I was a trained monkey a month ago, surgery tomorrow, may be on pain meds and might not make sense while commenting. Here's a Jeep SRT8.

DISCUSSION (29)

Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2 > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:07

Way to dance your ass off

And I hope your friends danced, 'cause your friends don't dance and if they don't dance. Well, they're no friends of mine

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:07

Pain meds are fun!

PatBateman > Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2
04/13/2014 at 23:08

It's how I (used to) roll. No dancing for at least 3 months.

Kailand09 > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:09

Best of luck. Might be a bit late, but I recommend having a neural surgeon perform surgeries like this in case they nick the nerves, they can repair it (but likely will be better at not hitting them).

Also, it should in fact cure that pain down your leg. As you can see, the disc is pushing against your nerve and that's the source of the pain. You may not lose all the pain or tingling, though.

PatBateman > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
04/13/2014 at 23:09

I haven't taken any since it happened. I have to be in a proper frame of mind at work. This should be interesting.

PatBateman > Kailand09
04/13/2014 at 23:11

The surgeon said that it would alleviate all the pain/numbness due to the location. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

Deal Killer - Powered by Focus > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:16

Yeah, back pain is NO fun. I fucked up my back this winter shoveling out my drive-way for the umpteenth time, and it landed me in the E.R. I had some wonderful pain meds there, dilaudid for the most part. That shit is EPIC at taking the pain away. I didn't feel "high" or anything, as it was a very low dose. I had some percocet's as a 'script, which weren't bad, but I found it hard to sleep after taking a couple before bed, and I couldn't take them during the day, as i have to drive and be lucid for work. I hope everything goes well, and the nurses are cute. That is always a big plus.

vdub_nut: scooter snob > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:17

The only solution to your woes

D > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:20

Kinja'd!!!

This is the perfect caption to the picture

PatBateman > D
04/13/2014 at 23:21

Not sure if it's grading my spine or my dancing skills. Both, probably.

D > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:22

I was just thinkin' a general "fuck"

birddog73 > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:25

Wait until you hit 40!

"Fun" becomes less about having fun and more about preservation.

vorspringing > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:25

Ow :( Good luck with the surgery, it's generally pretty straightforward when it's just the disc.

PatBateman > birddog73
04/13/2014 at 23:28

I'm about three years from it. I might as well be there.

My days of cliff diving, spelunking, and rappelling for fun are apparently over. I might as well order up a few cases of Geritol and Sentrum Silver.

PatBateman > vorspringing
04/13/2014 at 23:29

Yeah, I'm hoping it goes well. Thanks for the well wishes !

Jeff-God-of-Biscuits > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:32

Shake it, don't break it! Did you not listen?

birddog73 > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:39

I had a feeling you were close.

When we take the 3 wheelers or quads out I tend to pick and choose the trails I follow the young guns on.

Sometimes there is no shame in backing down.

Leadbull > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:43

Did you go to a chiropractor first?

I don't dance much, either. I'm 6'3", so people can always see me and it's awkward.

TwinCharged - Is Now UK Opponaut > PatBateman
04/13/2014 at 23:59

Ouch, that's gotta hurt like hell…

I remember once doing a piece of choreographed dance, where I had to run my arms against each other. I was too harsh and too quick and my thumb passed against my other thumb, the nail digging through and tearing through the skin. That was years ago and I've still got the scar today.

Kailand09 > PatBateman
04/14/2014 at 00:05

best of luck, I'm sure it will. I was just simply trying to state that it is possible a small bit can linger so you may not be surprised if there is some.

My mother went through the same surgery not too long ago, as has a load of people I know. Pretty common area to herniate, actually. You'll be great though, it isn't a crazy complicated surgery and usually you're up and walking right away.

Philbert/Phartnagle > PatBateman
04/14/2014 at 00:19

Good luck Pat. If you get to it fast enough AND it hasn't already damaged the nerve you may get lucky enough to avoid my experience with the same type of injury.

I had the same thing happen in 2000, but because of a work injury not dancing. While carrying some office furniture up some steep stairs, a coworker on the topside of the furniture lost his grip and dropped his end putting all of the weight back onto me. During the mad scramble to not fall down the stairs I managed to blow a disk out bad enough that it also damaged the nerve. The docs ended up fusing the vertebrae together using some special titanium screws because the disk was too badly damaged to save. The operation did help the immediate mind numbing, screaming pain, but because of the nerve damage my back still hurts and my right leg is still numb and tingly all the way down to my toes to this day.

P.S. Don't count on getting to lay around and rest if your docs prescribe to the same recovery procedures as mine did back then. They had me up and walking the very next day. Somewhere they found two giant gorillas (nurses/orderlies) and they more or less got on each side of me and frog marched me up and down the hallways.

Frank Grimes > PatBateman
04/14/2014 at 00:24

can I assign you some homework of making a journal while on drugs. most of it should be drawings but ramblings and poetry would be good too. I think it would be funny.

PatBateman > Philbert/Phartnagle
04/14/2014 at 01:21

I was at the doc's office within a week of the incident. They have said that I could do physical therapy instead, but I'd prefer to get this thing nipped before it becomes a MAJOR problem.

Looks like I caught it pretty early. :)

PatBateman > Leadbull
04/14/2014 at 01:25

I'll be going after I heal from surgery (2-3 months). The only way to really get it fixed is with surgery. Working out, strengthening my back, and getting adjustments will be a regular routine later this year.

The MRI showed that I don't have any other spine problems to speak of (my back is straight, no other weak links), so maintenance should be good.

Philbert/Phartnagle > PatBateman
04/14/2014 at 09:31

That's great Pat, personally I would NOT do physical therapy on any injury like that, ever again.

I didn't tell my whole story because it is/was a very long drawn out affair. Since I was injured at work I had to deal with work comp. They made me do physical therapy before they would even let the doctors do an MRI to see if they needed to operate and repair the damage. The physical therapy is basically what caused my nerve damage by constantly irritating the nerve from the disk hitting it and that has led to permanent back and leg pain, numbness and tingling for me. Since it was work comp, I am left with no other recourse than to live with the pain from then on out and I have to wonder just how many people they have fucked over like they did me and left them stuck with pain for the rest of their lives.

I wish you the best of luck, let me know how it turns out for you. :thumbup:

PatBateman > Philbert/Phartnagle
04/14/2014 at 10:44

Yeah, I wasn't thrilled at the thought of PT just trying to mask the pain. Give me surgery.

I'm out out of surgery , btw. On my way home. No radiating pain down my leg!! Woohoo!

PatBateman > Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2
04/14/2014 at 10:52

HOW DID I NOT CATCH YOUR 80S REFERENCE UNTIL NOW?!

Much ashame.

Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2 > PatBateman
04/14/2014 at 10:53

I added it after I posted the first time. Had to include it. So, no worries.

Philbert/Phartnagle > PatBateman
04/14/2014 at 12:37

Alright, that's awesome! Glad it worked out for you that well so far.