"JACU - I've got bonifides." (jacu) 04/02/2014 at 11:33 • Filed to: None

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We've got bees in our house! I can hear the distant sound of a pack of tiny high-revving Mazda rotaries. I've found seven so far. And just when we were looking for another house too.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > JACU - I've got bonifides. 04/02/2014 at 11:34

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m2m, apex detective > JACU - I've got bonifides. 04/02/2014 at 11:35

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JACU - I've got bonifides. > m2m, apex detective 04/02/2014 at 11:36

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Oh thanks for that!

Nibbles > JACU - I've got bonifides. 04/02/2014 at 11:37

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Agrajag > JACU - I've got bonifides. 04/02/2014 at 11:38

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Meanwhile in your attic.

'Wägen, EPA LOL > JACU - I've got bonifides. 04/02/2014 at 11:43

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Call an exterminator - depending on the type of bee they can be really destructive. I had some get in a wall last summer, but lucked out as to how quickly we caught it and the type of bee. Exterminator wasn't too expensive, especially compared to the cost of opening up a wall and rebuilding the destroyed framing.

RacecaR > JACU - I've got bonifides. 04/02/2014 at 11:49

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Did you recently invite the Wu Tang clan over?



JACU - I've got bonifides. > Agrajag 04/02/2014 at 11:50

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Not my attic. Cathedral ceilings everywhere. But I get your point!

ttyymmnn > JACU - I've got bonifides. 04/02/2014 at 11:57

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You might call a bee removal company instead of an exterminator. If the aren't Africanized bees, then they shouldn't be killed. The world is running out of bees. No, really.

JACU - I've got bonifides. > RacecaR 04/02/2014 at 11:58

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Why yes. Yes I did. They couldn't make it. The Clueless Clucks Clan offered their entertainment services as well, but I refused, feeling they might be a tad inappropriate for a child's birthday party.

JACU - I've got bonifides. > Nibbles 04/02/2014 at 12:02

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Absolutely hilarious. Made me forget for a moment we're KEEPING BEES!

JACU - I've got bonifides. > ttyymmnn 04/02/2014 at 12:03

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I concur. I don't think people realize just how freakin' important domestic bees are to our well being.

m2m, apex detective > JACU - I've got bonifides. 04/02/2014 at 12:04

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If you close your eyes, it sounds like someone motorboating. ;)

JACU - I've got bonifides. > m2m, apex detective 04/02/2014 at 12:10

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Maybe if it were Pee Wee Herman motorboating, which is not only hard to imagine but also a bit sickening.

I've been motorboating since I met my first wife at the tender age of 16. And my second wife was even more amply endowed to allow only premium motorboating. I know motorboating. What I'm hearing does not sound like motorboating!

Merkin Muffley > JACU - I've got bonifides. 04/02/2014 at 12:35

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Are they honeybees? If so:

If you haven't found the hive yet, put a saucer with a couple of spoonfuls of honey out on a table or countertop, and watch it. Once a bee finds it, it will return to the hive, do a little dance, and bring it's brethren. They will start going back and forth from the hive to the honey in the shortest distance possible- this is the origin of the phrase 'making a beeline for' something. Finding the hive will let you determine the scale of the problem. Once you have done that, call an apiarist (someone who keeps bees), not an exterminator. Your local extension office or ag center should be able to put you in touch with someone. The bees won't bother you if you don't bother them, although you should avoid using soaps and whatnot with a citrus scent.

If they are wasps or hornets, just drop a tactical nuke and start your life over. Never trust anything with a venomous ovipositor.

JACU - I've got bonifides. > Merkin Muffley 04/02/2014 at 12:40

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The last time I trusted something with a venomous ovipositor I got a fat lip for my trouble (and it looked freakin' hilarious too). Fortunately, Benadryl was my buddy and I really don't react too badly.

Merkin Muffley > JACU - I've got bonifides. 04/02/2014 at 12:43

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The trick is to cover your ears and keep still. They will go away after they check you out. Some particularly cretinous hymenopterae mistake ears for flowers, hence covering them. I caught a sting to my ear cartilage once when I was a kid because of that.