Guys. Seriously, guys.

"macanamera" (macanamera) 12/21/2014 at 04:53 • Filed to: None

3

39

I'm in a bar? Club? This girl has a fiance. She thinks my name is Lars and I'm from Germany (i never said she was smart). What do I do?

PS- I do a mean German accent, my friend from Zurich says it's impeccable.

PSS- Idk Lars is the best I had...

PSSS- I'm drunk

Laird Andrew Neby Bradleigh > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 04:51

11

You let her buy you a beer or ten, then you step away.

Denver Is Stuck In The 90s > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 04:56

11

She looks to be more plastic than flesh

Laird Andrew Neby Bradleigh > Denver Is Stuck In The 90s 12/21/2014 at 04:58

2

Plastic, bleach and booze paid by others I'd say.

Just4GP > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 05:00

1

Enjoy the night the best way you know how, without waking up with regrets. As far as tonight goes, you're the most interesting man in the world....

Dont forget to tell us jow it goes in the morning.

For the record, she won't look that good in the morning.

Denver Is Stuck In The 90s > Laird Andrew Neby Bradleigh 12/21/2014 at 05:00

6

So she used the whole chemistry set

E. Julius > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 05:01

4

She looks a bit skeezy. Engage at your own risk.

Laird Andrew Neby Bradleigh > Denver Is Stuck In The 90s 12/21/2014 at 05:09

0

Sure looks like it.

pip bip - choose Corrour > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 05:12

2

tell her you're gay.

she's probably a high class hooker.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 06:21

14

Make sure you wrap it good and tight.

JKER > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 06:22

0

Whatever you do, use protection. Better double up on it just to be safe.

duurtlang > pip bip - choose Corrour 12/21/2014 at 06:31

6

I question the 'high class' part.

pip bip - choose Corrour > duurtlang 12/21/2014 at 06:35

0

fair call!

Svend > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 07:23

1

I'm betting she's been slammed more times than the doors on a forty year old family car.

Would avoid.

E92M3 > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 08:28

1

First order of business, check for an adams apple.

Kylemaro > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 08:35

2

its a tarp!

her friends are back at the hotel room she plans to take you too after you get drunk and they're going to steal your organs

Kylemaro > JKER 12/21/2014 at 08:36

3

at can actually make both condoms break! because friction!

Kylemaro > E92M3 12/21/2014 at 08:36

1

fuck that just reach on down and see if you grab a handful of balls

Funktheduck > Laird Andrew Neby Bradleigh 12/21/2014 at 08:42

0

You forgot she keeps mascara companies in business. We should be hailing her as a hero of the economy.

signintoburnerlol > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 08:44

0

Put it in like the fiance does. In other women.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 09:10

0

No updates from macanamera so far. Either things have gone well, or gone not well.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Denver Is Stuck In The 90s 12/21/2014 at 09:20

1

Dude, she's a Cylon.

Clown Shoe Pilot > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 09:44

1

Did you hit it?

tromoly > Kylemaro 12/21/2014 at 11:26

1

I misread your comment and wondered how someone could "steal orgies"..........

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 12:02

1

Well Lars, I suggest you have another beer, carry on and tell us all where you woke up.

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > Denver Is Stuck In The 90s 12/21/2014 at 12:03

0

Is that bad?

Kylemaro > tromoly 12/21/2014 at 12:10

0

where there is a will, there is a way. thats as inspiring as it is disturbing

Redd, the RX-7 that could > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 12:19

2

one time I put the condom on backward because I was so drunk.. Let's just say I wasn't the only thing that came off inside her.

thebigbossyboss > Kylemaro 12/21/2014 at 12:21

1

Yeah but it's the concept. LOL.

Kylemaro > thebigbossyboss 12/21/2014 at 12:36

3

alright bear with me here, i'm not a condom engineer. but think of it like this. okay you got your dick, and you got one condom, and you put it on and alright that works, its some slimy latex slid over your flesh. now i don't know if you realize this, but in just a few minutes wether your inside the vagina or just "hangin out" that condom is gonna start to dry up, that is to say the lube evaporates or whatever, and it becomes basically dry latex. which can get hot, and make some friction, now....... do ya really wanna add another layer to that? of quickly dry warm friction-y latex. that in fact! moves separately from the other latex cover and your penis. not in an incredibly noticeable way because lets be honest you're thinking of other things in this situation. so imagine that. dick, latex layer over it, and they're moving kinda together but separately, and then another layer of latex over that also moving separately, gonna end up wearing a hole in one or probably both condoms and might even hurt your ding ding. use some sense everyone. only use one condom. if you dont think its good enough, buy some thicker better quality ones.

p.s.

......i feel dirty now

macanamera > Manwich - now Keto-Friendly 12/21/2014 at 12:46

2

I don't want to talk about it lol

jkm7680 > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 13:01

1

If this went any further than casual glances, I'd suggest you get tested.

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 12/21/2014 at 16:03

0

I think he's having one of those mornings where you wake up and ask yourself "How did I get here?"

And that makes me think of this song...

Sinanigans > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 16:40

1

XJDano > macanamera 12/21/2014 at 23:11

0

Are they real or fake?

Manuél Ferrari > macanamera 12/22/2014 at 21:47

0

Sooooo

What happened???

Clown Shoe Pilot > Kylemaro 12/22/2014 at 21:58

0

so what you're saying is to put some lube between the layers when you're double bagging

Kylemaro > Clown Shoe Pilot 12/23/2014 at 00:50

0

interesting theory, i'm not willing to risk having to raise a child on it though. you can test it out if you want i'll just stick to wearing one condom lol

Clown Shoe Pilot > Kylemaro 12/23/2014 at 07:31

0

i'm married, i haven't used condoms in a decade :)

Kylemaro > Clown Shoe Pilot 12/23/2014 at 11:41

0

i'm not married (its a trap) but i still use condoms because who knows whose got what.

well all the ladies know i got this BIG OLE DICK, lmao i just had to add that in