What would YOU drive if you viewed automobiles as appliances?

"Voice of C. Montgomery Burns" (voiceofcmb) 12/08/2014 at 15:20 • Filed to: None

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If this sounds like this has already been discussed, I will admit I got this idea from a previous thread that was something like What's The Best Car for a Non-Car Person? This thread produced mainly suggestions of your Civics, Camrys, Volts, etc.

Now, I may be crazy but this topic is slightly different in the sense that I'm not asking you what you'd recommend one of your non-Jalop parents should drive or something to that affect. I'm asking what do you think you would drive if you weren't as interested in automobiles? If you just wanted to get from A to B.

Take everything you know about yourself, strip out all your enthusiasm for hooning, racing, hypermiling, trendsetting, ego, hauling and so on. What auto do you think you'd end up with if you cared as much about cars as you do about washing your clothes?

Brian Silvestro > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:21

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Cherry_man1 > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:23

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Ford C-Max

Sn210 > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:23

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I had an eighth gen civic that never did me wrong. If it didn't bore me to death id probably still have it

Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:23

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A Prius with Google auto drive. I would only set in the drivers seat if that would be the only way to get it to activate.

ACESandEIGHTS > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:24

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Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. > Brian Silvestro 12/08/2014 at 15:24

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Sorry Brian, this falls into the hypermiling category. Choose again.

El-Verde > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:25

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BrownMiataDieselWagon > Brian Silvestro 12/08/2014 at 15:25

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Except that car is extremely Jalop

thereisnospork > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:25

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Well considering my blender has more hp than some lawnmowers...

Dwhite - Powered by Caffeine, Daft Punk, and Corgis > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:26

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Probably a Focus. Hatchback for the convenience and optional heated leather seats for comfort and resale value.

BrownMiataDieselWagon > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:26

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Prius

KirkyV > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:26

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VW Polo. Good-looking, in a conservative sort of way, but probably the most dull to drive/'refined' supermini on sale.

(Note: I desperately wish these were good to drive, because I really, really like the way they look. Regrettably, though, from the 1.2 to the GTI, the Polo's consistently duller than the competition.)

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:26

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Probably a Hyundai Accent or a Fiesta ST (seriously). I like small practical cars (weirdly, I own two completely impractical small cars), and I don't see that changing.

crowmolly > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:28

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Whatever has the longest warranty and best reliability.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Sn210 12/08/2014 at 15:28

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It never did you wrong, but did it ever do you good like the MR2 will?

Brian Silvestro > Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. 12/08/2014 at 15:28

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;_;

Fiesta 1.0L?

Brian Silvestro > BrownMiataDieselWagon 12/08/2014 at 15:29

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lol whoops

Alfalfa > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:29

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Despite the boring factor, my '10 Hyundai Sonata is a pretty good car. Except for the transmission. That kind of sucks. But if I weren't a car person, I probably wouldn't notice it. I say this because my wife certainly doesn't.

Sn210 > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 12/08/2014 at 15:29

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Heeelllllllllllll no

JustWaitingForAMate > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:30

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I feel dirty.

Funktheduck > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:31

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Probably my car: mazda3 hatchback. Room to haul my dogs, awesome gas mileage, good auto (mines manual), good styling.

If I extra didn't care or wanted cheaper: toyota matrix

promoted by the color red > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:31

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1995 Toyota Corolla. Overbuilt with Lexus technology from the days when Toyota only cared about being the best.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:36

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easily the answer is Accord 4dr because reasons I wish to not disclose.

All things considered, there isn't a better value out there

PNW Hoon > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:36

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My wife's 05 Corolla is amazing. It's impossible to kill, gets amazing gas mileage, costs nothing to maintain, and holds resale value.

At first I turned my nose up at it. It's slow. It sounds like a vacuum cleaner. It doesn't do anything interesting. No gizmos. No soul. BUT, it starts every day, takes all the abuse I can throw at it, and it never complains. 90k commuting miles, the thing has only needed oil and 1 sent of new tires. Brakes are going to need to be replaced around 100k. And everything is easy to work on and cheap.

I'm starting to think I might miss it when it finally goes. But hell, that's another 100k away...

Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. > Brian Silvestro 12/08/2014 at 15:39

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Ooooh, you're going to upset some people....not me, but others.

KirkyV > Brian Silvestro 12/08/2014 at 15:39

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I wouldn't say so. There may be some differences in suspension set-up that negate this somewhat over in the US - even in 'world' cars, it seems the US frequently gets slightly softer suspension configurations, to cater to local road-conditions and tastes - but where I live, the Fiesta is easily the best-driving modern supermini around, from the 1.0 to the ST. If I were an enthusiast with a small amount of money*, who had to get a brand-new car for whatever reason, the base Fiesta's the one I'd choose.

*Of course, I am an enthusiast with a small amount of money, but I could have two and a half EP3 Type Rs for the cost of that base Fiesta, so...

Brian Silvestro > KirkyV 12/08/2014 at 15:40

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Yeah, I'd never actually buy a new car if I had the choice.

Rico > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:42

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Any LS/GS Lexus.

Racescort666 > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:45

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When it comes down to it, cars are still very utilitarian. Sticking with the washing machine analogy: you don't need a commercial washing machine if you don't have a lot of clothes to wash. That is, single and/or no kids. The same goes for cars, it depends on what you need.

For someone single and/or no kids, something small does just fine. Brian's Honda Insight is a great one. I would still recommend something like a Honda Fit, Fiesta, or a Mazda2 because they're small, good quality, and get good mileage. For something a little bigger, there are many more options, Civic, Corolla, Focus, Mazda3, Cruise all are excellent.

Families: minivan is the answer. If you look at the numbers and are determined to be utilitarian, you can't really beat a minivan.

Some people need to tow/haul stuff minivan still isn't a bad choice. I used to tow my sailboat with my subaru and it did just fine. According to Edmunds, the Honda Odyssey is good to 3500 lbs. This would be fine for a number of fairly small things that only need to be towed 2-3 times a year (less than 1% of the time). Anything more than that, I'd recommend a truck.

Conclusion: it's kind of a weird thing recommending cars to people when they declare they are not into cars. I tend to use the word "performance" and it gets me weird looks among non-car people. They are no doubt imagining cornering and acceleration when I use that word but what it really means is whether it meets your expectations. Is the ride soft, does it make too much noise, does it have good storage, is it comfortable, is it easy to get in and out of, do you like the way the stereo sounds, is the steering too heavy, do you feel confident when you're driving it, can you see out of it well? As an automotive engineer, these are all performance categories to me and many of them customers care about even if they are a non-car person.

KirkyV > Brian Silvestro 12/08/2014 at 15:45

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I really don't understand why anyone does, particularly where I live. You lose an utterly ridiculous amount of money in depreciation—certainly more than you'll make back with the warranty.

Still, I'm glad people do: where would all the crazy-depreciated hot hatches I covet come from, otherwise?

RallyWrench > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:53

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Probably exactly what I drive daily now, a hammered '01 Outback. I work on cars every day. The last thing I want to do at the end of the day is work on mine. Boring, reliable, comfortable, practical.

BrownMiataDieselWagon > Brian Silvestro 12/08/2014 at 15:53

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I'd kill for a clean first gen manual Insight. 1850 pounds, no A/C, no sunroof, no power windows. It's basically a racecar. Then rip out those batteries and electric motor and K20 swap because even moar racecar.

Brian Silvestro > BrownMiataDieselWagon 12/08/2014 at 15:54

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THIS

That would be fucking awesome.

CalzoneGolem > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 15:55

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I'd just lease.

BrownMiataDieselWagon > Brian Silvestro 12/08/2014 at 15:59

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~200whp in a sub-1800 pound car that still gets 50mpg mucho bueno

Brian Silvestro > BrownMiataDieselWagon 12/08/2014 at 16:05

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Autophile412 - what's the world got in store? > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 16:24

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I would drive one of these. with a roof rack and one of those cool aerodynamic boxes on top.

Logansteno: Bought a VW? > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 16:27

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Probably a Malibu or some other American sedan.

ly2v8-Brian > Brian Silvestro 12/08/2014 at 16:30

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close, fiesta sedan is the answer you're looking for.

ly2v8-Brian > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 16:30

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Golf

Brian Silvestro > ly2v8-Brian 12/08/2014 at 16:32

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Fiesta sedan is always the answer.

mazda616 > promoted by the color red 12/08/2014 at 16:47

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My sister-in-law drives one of these that she got for $600. It is a tank. Can't kill it. Believe me, she's tried (wrecked it twice within a week and never ever does any maintenance).

As for me, I'd probably go for one of these Corollas:

My mom bought one just like that brand new in 2000 and it was comfortable-ish, quiet, big enough to fit my bicycle in the trunk with the back seats folded down, and got close to 40 MPG. Seeing it now, I realize this generation was one of the last over-engineered yet still simple bulletproof Corollas.

norskracer98-ExploringTheOutback > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 17:28

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This is kind of a hard question to answer. Even if everything isn't fun to drive it has some sort of interesting thing about it. I also can't remove the car from me. IT's IN MY FOR LIFE.

Axial > El-Verde 12/08/2014 at 18:40

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[/discussion]

Axial > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 18:42

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I'd probably go with a loaded new Chrysler 200C V6 AWD. Looks like a pretty great value to me; very nice interior to sit in, lots of comfort options, enough power to scoot you through an opening when the traffic sucks, decent fuel economy.

CaptDale - is secretly British > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 18:51

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A 2010 Hyundai Sonata (i think limited). Since its just old enough to be cheap, but not burtout with a million miles. Also there is room for people, pets, kids, and/or groceries. It is cheap to maintain and cheap on gas. All around boring sensible car, with a touch above base model because I'm not buy my high schooler a car, I'm buying me a car. There is also the fact I work at a GMC, Buick, Cadillac, Subaru, and Hyundai dealership, services and parts are discounted... So there is that.

ranwhenparked > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 20:32

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A non-car person should still care about having a decent car that delivers good value for money. Right now, I've been thinking the Chrysler 200 might be the smartest buy in the midsize arena. A 295hp Pentastar V6, leather trimmed sports seats, and 9 speed automatic for $25,700 is a combination that even non-car people can recognize as a hell of a deal.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/08/2014 at 23:12

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Subaru outback, probably 10-15 years old. Because cheap, AWD for the snowy mountain, reliable, lots of space for outdoorsy things, room for the family and their things.

It's basically the plebe version of my wife's E320 4matic wagon.

Captain of the Enterprise > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 12/09/2014 at 16:19

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Probably still a crown vic, I didn't choose it anyway it choose me "I got it from the dead grandparent inheritance fund" (Adam Ferrara) But it is safe, dependable, decent on gas (I get 19 mpg) for its size, can hold a lot of people and things and has doesn't struggle with power or handling.

As a car guy though it's a slightly different story

TheHondaBro > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 01/08/2015 at 11:42

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Some wretched Honda or Toyota.

Dean > Voice of C. Montgomery Burns 01/13/2015 at 10:22

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I tell people all the time if I was a reasonable person, I'd have one. I am not a reasonable person.