Balls of Spiel: Tales of the Apex: High school madness

"webmonkees" (kayoteq-of-the-forest)
08/10/2013 at 10:02 • Filed to: Gonzo

"I knew it was called dead man's curve, but I wasn't about to cause any distractions. Not that it mattered.."

High school. That intense fellow that knows how to drive. No contradicting them, no distraction, just a calm period where instructions can be suggested and ignored.

And yet you know.

Even as a passenger. In the back. 65mph. Turn rated for 25. Rear wheels sliding, gravel flying from the outside edge as the corner slides out. Right on the ragged edge.

And yet. You know.

It's going to be fine, this guy's crazy but at least he knows how to drive.

—And then I recommend reading some Hunter S. Thompson for proper 'edge of madness' spiels.

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Laws were broken. Cars were hooned. The night went without further incident other than 'don't do that again', as I feel he did err a bit in estimating the inertia with a full load of passengers. But just barely.

Good to be alive.

I can produce mugshots, but that would be rude.

How to Figure Out If You May Survive The Night

(*high school edition. Young and dumb)

0: Grab the keys if you truly think there's a danger.

Disclaimer:

Much of this involves a mutual drunkenness among parties involved. Probably not DUI level for the author, but tipsy perhaps at times. Better behaved these days.

They may pull a knife on you, but at least you can look at that scratch on the bumper where your car got pushed around the driveway, and go, "Yeah, I'm glad we took the keys."

Also, don't get the impression they drove drunk a lot. That's wrong. Okay, maybe partially correct.

I'm talking about sober crazy driving.

1. Seatbelts . If the ranting raving fellow puts on his belt, you better. There's bound to be a quick turn in your future. Good idea anyway, even before they required it.

2. Competence v. Confidence. They aren't talking about the driving, they just are. Intensely. Whether that's backed up by anything, well, you'll know.

Back to #0: The hazard of intense freaks is if you take away their driving privileges, this means they are drunk. Enough to say, end up on the roof of your car. Since it was only a parking lot drive across, it's better to just go with it than get in a fight.

Rum is a helluva drug.

DISCUSSION (4)

Tom McParland > webmonkees
08/10/2013 at 10:21

First, welcome to Oppo! Second, this is a great hook can't wait to read the rest.

webmonkees > Tom McParland
08/10/2013 at 11:34

Thanks. Yeah, I guess it needs more context, wacky diagrams. or the time my car got pushed around the road because he pulled a knife.

Or pissed in the cop car. Or declared that AC/DC at any volume is a protected first amendment right of Americans everywhere.

But he knew how to drive. Except in certain states where outstanding warrants were active.

Tom McParland > webmonkees
08/10/2013 at 18:00

Yeah dude you definitely need to tell more stories. Just a FYI publish them during the week for more exposure. :)

webmonkees > Tom McParland
08/10/2013 at 23:50

Thanks. It's a hybrid of ideal description of circumstances, but for the most part these things happen. I will strive to continue the stuff. Some survivor has to tell the tale.

I was a bit disturbed how much drunk was involved when recalling the details, but again, this was high school. 90s. And yes, in case anyone wondered what the point was of the car, that was the car. I was in the back counting the gravel bounces in slow motion.