It's Often Not A BMW At All: Show Me YOUR Non-Bimmer Asshats!

"Lets Just Drive" (lets-just-drive) 12/12/2013 at 23:41 • Filed to: ASSHATS OF ALL MAKES AND MODELS

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In response to the ire-filled post about a Bimmer parkerading as a human being, thought I'd just gather some Oppo sourced proof that asshats come in all makes and models.

Here are three, to start the ball rolling.

shpuker > Lets Just Drive 12/12/2013 at 23:46

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This is the run off area designed for handicap vans at WalMart. Sits right next to the cart return (which the Prius is maybe 2 inches away from).... Fuck (the majority of) Prius drivers.

Lets Just Drive > shpuker 12/12/2013 at 23:48

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BMW hate, I don't get. I don't get the whole hater thing in general.

However; I reserve a special place in hell for the Prius and it's typical owner.

Rainbow > Lets Just Drive 12/12/2013 at 23:50

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Lets Just Drive > Rainbow 12/12/2013 at 23:52

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I like the three who got together to collectively and in an organized fashion fuck over the organized collective.

Fuck chaos. This is anarchaos.

shpuker > Lets Just Drive 12/12/2013 at 23:52

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After working at the BMW dealer pushing the second most inventory in the nation, I completely understand it. I don't entirely condone it, but when it's accurate well over 70% of the time it just becomes expected.

Though I must say, many of the BMW douches are moving on to Audi's and Boxsters/Caymans, and that makes me happy. Cause I do like BMW's, they're quite fun.

Aaron James > Lets Just Drive 12/12/2013 at 23:58

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This looks less than ideal

With-a-G is back to not having anything written after his username > Lets Just Drive 12/12/2013 at 23:59

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wow

such anecdote

very reaction

DasWauto > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 00:00

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No pictures but in the last two days two first gen equinoxes have stood out to me for their terrible parking. Both were completely diagonal (45 degrees or more) to the spot they were occupying (and then some). Amusingly people had continued parking normally around one of them, meaning that they would have had a very hard time if they wanted to leave. A little bit of vigilante justice right there.

Anyway, I guess this means that all Chevy Equinox drivers are asshats.

Lets Just Drive > shpuker 12/13/2013 at 00:00

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A douche is a douche is a douche. Don't matter what they drive. Just so happens that many douches follow other douches douchily. It's how Ed Hardy got rich, how Affliction and Tap-Out even existed as "fashion" entities.

Can't really fault the free market for taking douchtastic advantage of the douchetrends.

shpuker > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 00:03

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Douchely said. I like it. No-douche.

Lets Just Drive > Aaron James 12/13/2013 at 00:03

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I have no idea what I'm doing.

That's okay, neither do I.

Lets Just Drive > With-a-G is back to not having anything written after his username 12/13/2013 at 00:04

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Soon.

Lets Just Drive > DasWauto 12/13/2013 at 00:07

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I bought a Volvo 760 for that very reason; so I could drive it and park it with indifference to the ignorance of others. I boxed in shitty parkers left and right because I didn't care if my Vo' got dinged and there was no way in hell anyone was moving that thing without a tow. I'd wait for people to try and make the illegal inside turns, making lanes where none exist, only to - and in the complete and legal right - turn into them forcing the other drivers into quick reactions at which point I'd shrug like, "Hit my tank. It'll be funny and you'll be in the wrong." Because that Volvo didn't budge. It was like, "Hello unstoppable force, I am immovable object."

DasWauto > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 00:13

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I need a car like this. I care too much about mine, mediocre as it might be.

I should buy a beater truck, both for rwd fun and the not-giving-a-shit factor.

Lets Just Drive > DasWauto 12/13/2013 at 00:18

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If you have the space and room in your budget, having a Zero Fucks Given car is just so wonderful. If it's reliable and costs you less in money than it does in headache and you can stand to drive it, they're so much win.

Former cabbie here and I went through a few ex-cop-to-ex-cab Panther's in my earlier years and let me just tell you; driving a boat that'll wreck other boats means you're not fucking concerned about assholes in dinghy's.

DasWauto > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 00:24

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I can imagine. I actually love driving my parents' old Ranger around for this reason. It'll hang the tail out if the road is even a little slippery and it's got enough dents, scrapes and rust not to care about it. If only it wasn't an automatic (and such a bad one at that).

I will buy myself a little truck at some point. Now I'll spend the next hour on Kijiji and autotrader looking around instead of sleeping. Worth it.

Lets Just Drive > DasWauto 12/13/2013 at 00:45

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Totally been there.

The hope with the 'vo was to get around to dropping an 8 in there and have a ratty but fun Volv8. Turns out that the reason I picked the car up for a song was that the fat lady had already sung hers and there was no way to make it cost effective. Shame, as I've always lusted after a Volv8.

webmonkees > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 00:47

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I was the correctly parked one, come out of the store to see this. I figured contact, but didn't find anything. Know your car's parking radius, especially for these skyscrapers that have only a vague notion of what goes on beyond the hood.

Ferrero1911 > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 00:59

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Lets Just Drive > Ferrero1911 12/13/2013 at 01:20

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Fuck you, the horse you rode in on and your fucking shopping carts!

Zipppy, Mazdurp builder, Probeski owner and former ricerboy > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 01:29

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A couple I spotted.

A Beetle, how untypical.

Blatant asshat in a Malibu.

YSI-what can brown do for you > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 02:31

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These two guys, granted one is a BMW

Ferrero1911 > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 02:31

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At least they were actually handicapped.

Ferrero1911 > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 02:39

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Not only was this guy parked on the sidewalk, it was also a street cleaning day. I'm sure the ticket was expensive since a street cleaning ticket alone is $75.

thebigbossyboss > Zipppy, Mazdurp builder, Probeski owner and former ricerboy 12/13/2013 at 08:35

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I give that Malibu a pass. There is literally noone else around, which is probably why he parked like he did. I don`t consider it asshat when your way off out of the way.

thebigbossyboss > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 08:37

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Cant post pics, but can post link to pic. http://oppositelock.jalopnik.com/its-always-a-c…

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!

WhiskeyGolf > Lets Just Drive 12/13/2013 at 10:15

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I'd be curious to see the security footage of many asshat parking jobs because while it looks like I've parked my car above with a blatant disregard for the painted lines, it was actually because there was still a full space available between two other badly parked vehicles. Do I get a pass?

Some of them look completely premeditated, though, so screw those people.

Zipppy, Mazdurp builder, Probeski owner and former ricerboy > thebigbossyboss 12/13/2013 at 14:11

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You know what, you're right.

Lets Just Drive > Ferrero1911 12/13/2013 at 14:32

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There was a guy who used to park on the curb in my old neighborhood. Sometimes part on, sometimes a full wheel up and sometimes nothing at all. But he was also the bane of the neighborhood and none of his neighbors liked him (partied late, on weekdays, and generally had no regard for the people around him) so when leaf collection rolled around one year and the expectation was for property owners to leave their leaves on the curb for city pick up, everyone, and I mean everyone, buried his truck in leaves. Buried.

Garland - Last Top Comment on Splinter > Lets Just Drive 12/16/2013 at 21:34

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Saw a super-asshat Jaguar straddling a handicapped spot at Wal-Mart (no card or tag, of course). Too dark to get a picture, though.

Lets Just Drive > Garland - Last Top Comment on Splinter 12/16/2013 at 21:37

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Saw a black Mustang parked in a handicapped space on Friday. Realized it was mine and that I'd so raced into the liquor store that I didn't even notice the faintly painted wheelchair stickman on the ground. Wasn't until I got into the store that I thought about it and asked one of the staff if that was a disabled parking space.

So I was really fast.

Mind you, this was 5 mins before closing and the entire parkinglot was empty. Not that it's an excuse, but there you go.

thebigbossyboss > Lets Just Drive 12/16/2013 at 21:37

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Lets Just Drive > thebigbossyboss 12/16/2013 at 21:42

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The bowtie needs to tuck right in there, block that fucker from getting in their drivers side.

Garland - Last Top Comment on Splinter > Lets Just Drive 12/16/2013 at 21:45

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I've seen some pretty faded spots, so much that you can barely see them in broad daylight, much less at night.

This Wal-Mart had fresh lines, so I doubt that applied to Assguar.

lie2me > Lets Just Drive 12/16/2013 at 21:54

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Lets Just Drive > lie2me 12/16/2013 at 21:58

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Four? FOUR!!

I feel like the owner of this car should be crippled by cripples for this crippling parking job. Like, a bunch of whacks with crutches, canes and run over (shin area) by numerous heavy men in wheelchairs.

thebigbossyboss > Lets Just Drive 12/16/2013 at 22:48

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Haha, I'll try better next time.

Lets Just Drive > thebigbossyboss 12/16/2013 at 23:01

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Ah, that's your car. And you appear to like it.

Completely understands not parking him in. Wouldn't want to risk door dings either.

Is mine.