"Turner950" (Turner950)
10/18/2013 at 23:23 • Filed to: None
1
14|
"Turner950" (Turner950)
10/18/2013 at 23:23 • Filed to: None | 1
| 14 |
As the most powerful person in the free world, you've got any vehicle you could ever want at your fingertips. However, at this particular hypothetical moment, the government is shut down and the only vehicles you can choose from are:
1. Nimitz Class Aircraft Carrier (USS Abraham Lincoln)
-260,000 Horsepower
-35+ MPH
-90 Aircraft
-Unlimited Range (But must return to dock every 20-25 years)
2. Boeing VC-25 AKA Air Force One
-200,000+ lb-ft
-630mph top speed
-7800 mile range
-Room for 76 passengers
3. Joe Biden's Bitchin Firebird
-300 grass-fed all-American horses
-More reliable than Congress
-50/50 weight distribution as confirmed by the scales of justice
-Denim cutoffs not included
Lets Just Drive
> Turner950
10/18/2013 at 23:27 |
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Daily Drive: Joe Biden's Bitchin Firebird
Track: Joe Biden's Bitchin Firebird
Burn: Joe Biden's Bitchin Firebird
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Turner950
> Turner950
10/18/2013 at 23:27 |
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Personally, I think I'd DD the Lincoln, track the Boeing and burn the Firebird. Sorry Bandit.
Ravey Mayvey Slurpee Surprise
> Turner950
10/18/2013 at 23:27 |
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DD: USS Abraham Lincoln
Track: The Bitchin' Camaro
Sell to lower debt: Air Force One
getchapopcorn
> Turner950
10/18/2013 at 23:28 |
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WRONG!
firebird, next issue.
McLarry
> Ravey Mayvey Slurpee Surprise
10/18/2013 at 23:33 |
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You'd probably get more for the carrier...Nimitz class carriers run about 4.5B
NotACactus
> Turner950
10/18/2013 at 23:34 |
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DD: Nimitz-Class
Track: Air Force One
Burn: Firebird
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Ravey Mayvey Slurpee Surprise
> McLarry
10/18/2013 at 23:34 |
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As true as this may be, I can't impose my will on small islands with AF1.
PatBateman
> Turner950
10/18/2013 at 23:45 |
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DD: Gimme the aircraft carrier. Yeah, it only goes less than 60 knots, but the jets...
Plus, I'd blow up all that dare ridicule me in any shape, form, or fashion. PREPARE TO DIE, KID FROM MY SIXTH GRADE YEAR THAT CALLED ME A "DICK". Vengeance is MINE.
Track: AF Uno. Because I could pick up more prime tail with my own god damned 747 than I could with a Pontiac.
vdub_nut: scooter snob
> Turner950
10/19/2013 at 00:00 |
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DD: AF1
Track: Nimitz
Fire Chicken: JOE BIDENS BITCHEN CAMERO
M54B30
> Turner950
10/19/2013 at 00:16 |
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Fill the Abe Lincoln (the only Lincoln that is best among competitors...) with 5,000 hot chicks and I'd DD the bejeesus out of it. Hot chicks, jets, bombs, guns, catapults... I'd just do circles in the Caribbean or Mediterranean for about 20 years.
ASheep
> M54B30
10/19/2013 at 00:37 |
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I like the way you think.
PetarVN, GLI Guy, now with stupid power
> Turner950
10/19/2013 at 00:44 |
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DD: the bird
Track: Nimitz, because 260,000 horsepower brah, I get it from my US military decals brah, and brah, it's got all American veetak, brah
burn: air force 1, shame it's not a Ferrari, it could do it by itself
Argent
> Turner950
10/19/2013 at 01:27 |
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DD:Nimitz
Track:I'd set up an autocross on the deck of the carrier in the middle of a storm and run the Firebird for shits and giggles (mostly shits).
Burn: AF1 Because doing that would still save us some money.
stuttgartobsessed
> Turner950
10/19/2013 at 03:19 |
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I'd FOR SURE DD the Carrier. Then I would clear the decks of all the jets and just keep a couple helicopters to I can land on islands/monaco. Then I would TRACK the Firebird on the fucking deck! I'd burn the 747 at sea for an awesome light show for the giant parties Id throw on deck.