How to school a pretentious parker

Kinja'd!!! by "sm70- why not Duesenberg?" (sm70-whynotduesenberg)
Published 11/23/2017 at 10:56

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STARS: 23


Picture this scenario in your head: it’s Thanksgiving morning, and you’ve forgotten something for the dinner table that night, so you run out the the grocery store. Once you get there, your eyes are immediately drawn to a brand new black 911, whose owner has decided that he and his car are important/precious enough to warrant two parking spaces. He’s way off on the edge of the lot, so keying the car would be excessive (it always is). So what do you do? Leave a passive-aggressive note? Squeeze your car as close to theirs as possible? Draw a penis into the dirt on the car with your finger? Maybe. Or, if you’re one of the members of our Nebraska Car Spotters page who also happens to drive a seven figure Porsche 918 Spyder, you simply pull into the next space over and park perfectly between the lines, showing Mr. Big Shot in his 911 that nobody is too important to park correctly.

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Replies (17)

Kinja'd!!! "Nerd-Vol" (Nerd-Vol)
11/23/2017 at 11:02, STARS: 3

Mr. 918 says get your weight up to Mr. 911

Kinja'd!!! "dogisbadob" (dogisbadob)
11/23/2017 at 11:06, STARS: 2

two motorcycles should park there ;)

Kinja'd!!! "Urambo Tauro" (urambotauro)
11/23/2017 at 11:10, STARS: 6

Parking centered between the lines isn’t showing off enough. That’s just meeting the status quo (despite whatever Mr. Big Shot thinks). If you really want to show off, you gotta back into the spot and nail it on the first try while Mr. Big Shot is watching.

Kinja'd!!! "Little Black Coupe Turned Silver" (littleblackcoupe)
11/23/2017 at 11:14, STARS: 0

I’ve now laughed at this twice.

Kinja'd!!! "sm70- why not Duesenberg?" (sm70-whynotduesenberg)
11/23/2017 at 11:16, STARS: 0

Oh good someone added you!

Kinja'd!!! "McMike" (mcmike)
11/23/2017 at 11:17, STARS: 12

If you are all out of 918s, this will do.

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Kinja'd!!! "Wacko" (wacko--)
11/23/2017 at 11:24, STARS: 2

i would write

Parking spot for Assholes

Kinja'd!!! "Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer" (smallbear94)
11/23/2017 at 11:24, STARS: 1

This is true. Definitely should have backed in even if the 911 owner wasn’t there though.

Kinja'd!!! "Little Black Coupe Turned Silver" (littleblackcoupe)
11/23/2017 at 11:34, STARS: 0

I posted a spot yesterday!

Kinja'd!!! "McMike" (mcmike)
11/23/2017 at 11:39, STARS: 0

I save those comments for if they parked closer.

Kinja'd!!! "Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap" (ddadragon)
11/23/2017 at 11:49, STARS: 0

Me if i owned anything nice

Kinja'd!!! "Wacko" (wacko--)
11/23/2017 at 11:51, STARS: 2

that’s why you keep these preprinted in your glove box

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Kinja'd!!! "McMike" (mcmike)
11/23/2017 at 12:33, STARS: 7

haha.

I have left angry notes before. Not sarcastic, but over-the-top aggressive notes about their parking job, often getting the make/model wrong if I thought it would stike a nerve.

I would end it with stating that I hope the scratches I put in their paint of their precious (insert camero in place of “Mustang”) would make them think twice about parking like that again..

...but not leave a scratch. :)

The thought of them fuming, scoring over the entire car looking for the scratch makes me giggle.

Kinja'd!!! "TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts." (thebloody)
11/23/2017 at 12:37, STARS: 1

My favorite note to leave is “You’re super cute thinking that heap of shit is worth two spots”.

Kinja'd!!! "sm70- why not Duesenberg?" (sm70-whynotduesenberg)
11/23/2017 at 13:29, STARS: 1

SVR Jag? I’m 95% sure that’s the first one of those to have been shared on the page, so nice!

Kinja'd!!! "SpeedSix" (speedsix)
11/23/2017 at 14:34, STARS: 0

Thanks for the suggestion!

Kinja'd!!! "415s30 W123TSXWaggoIIIIIIo ( •_•))°)" (415s30)
11/26/2017 at 16:04, STARS: 1

Oh burn