by "ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
Published 11/13/2017 at 12:02
by "ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
Published 11/13/2017 at 12:02
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STARS: 1
If you’re turing 50, or thinking about turning 50, you should have one too. The worst part is cleaning out your insides the day before.
"Yowen - not necessarily not spaghetti and meatballs" (yowen)
11/13/2017 at 12:05, STARS: 0
How’s the first poo after the cleaning? Did you celebrate it with a special meal?
"punkgoose17" (punkgoose17)
11/13/2017 at 12:07, STARS: 0
I had one on Friday.
"punkgoose17" (punkgoose17)
11/13/2017 at 12:10, STARS: 0
You cannot eat until after the procedure.
"ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)" (adabofoppo)
11/13/2017 at 12:11, STARS: 2
I’m only 35 and have to have one in January. They are still trying to diagnose why I basically can’t eat food without being in agony afterward. Nothing conclusive from my upper scope; because of course I can’t have a giant flashing neon sign telling my GI Doc that I have celiacs or whatever food allergy I do have and make this all easy.
Sigh...
I am so tired of eating rice and beans.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:12, STARS: 1
The laxatives kick in first, then, after the two bottles of magnesium citrate, you are basically shitting hot water. It’s not terribly pleasant, but I’ve experienced worse in my life.
"punkgoose17" (punkgoose17)
11/13/2017 at 12:12, STARS: 0
The cleaning is not as bad as when I eat MSG with my really bad gluten intolerance. Hopefully I don’t need another colonoscopy until I am 50.
"Jcarr" (jcarr)
11/13/2017 at 12:12, STARS: 5
Reminds me of a terrible experience a family friend of ours had.
He went in for his around his 50th birthday. I think typically you lay on your side, but for whatever reason, the doc had him bend over a table. They spread his cheeks and then taped them to the table so they stayed spread. As soon as he finishes taping, the doc realizes that he forgot something in another room and steps out quick to grab it. He fails to pull the door all the way closed, though, and it starts to creep open. The family friend is sitting there helpless to stop it, with his ass pointed straight at the door.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:13, STARS: 1
Came home after the procedure and had three scrambled eggs with cheese, sausage, an english muffin, and coffee. It tasted damned good. Actually, not eating for a day is the worst part.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:14, STARS: 1
Sorry to hear that. I have a friend who has severe Crohn’s disease, and had his first colonoscopy when he was 15. I hope it turns out okay. Best wishes.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:14, STARS: 1
And you didn’t blog about it??
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:16, STARS: 1
That sounds damned crazy. They turned me on my side, put me to sleep, and I woke up in the recovery room. They could have been playing beer pong on my ass and I wouldn’t have known it.
"Jcarr" (jcarr)
11/13/2017 at 12:18, STARS: 2
My wife had one at 25 for much the same issue. Also had a scope and a ph test to no avail. She tested negative for Celiac, but we finally discovered that even though she’s negative, gluten was the problem. She would spend nights in agony and we couldn’t figure it out, but after cutting gluten out, she’s been fine.
Good luck and keep pestering your docs or see other ones until you get an answer.
"Jcarr" (jcarr)
11/13/2017 at 12:19, STARS: 1
If I hadn’t heard it direct from him, I wouldn’t have believed it.
"HammerheadFistpunch" (hammerheadfistpunch)
11/13/2017 at 12:19, STARS: 7
I thought about turning 50, but it seemed like a lot of work so I don’t think I will.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:20, STARS: 4
If only it were voluntary. They say you’re only as old as you feel, but I prefer my corollary, which is “You don’t have to feel as old as you are.”
"Jcarr" (jcarr)
11/13/2017 at 12:21, STARS: 1
Also, check out number 4 in this list. Gets my inner 12-year-old every time.
http://www.cracked.com/blog/10-brilliant-comedy-moments-hidden-youtube/
"ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)" (adabofoppo)
11/13/2017 at 12:21, STARS: 0
I am wishing upon all the deities that I don’t have Crohn’s.
And making the change to a GF and dairy-free diet at 35 is super strange. The initial hilarity of me feeling like a 35-year-old pasty white new student at school who doesn’t know how to order food yet has worn off. Now it’s just a dull tedium of boring food.
Yay for being alive though.
"Highlander-Datsuns are Forever" (jamesbowland)
11/13/2017 at 12:21, STARS: 0
Why do they put you to sleep, the scope isn’t that big. Going under is a bit risky isn’t it?
"McMike" (mcmike)
11/13/2017 at 12:22, STARS: 5
I’m scheduled for one in three weeks. I’ll ask for pics.
"diplodicus" (diplodicus)
11/13/2017 at 12:22, STARS: 0
You try getting high? It’ helps with crohns disease, which is basically the same symptoms you have.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:23, STARS: 0
Any anesthesia is inherently risky, but this stuff is very low risk. It’s not as deep a sedation as the one used for all-out surgery. You don’t have to be sedated; my brother-in-law had a colonoscopy while awake because his insurance wouldn’t cover the anesthesia and he didn’t want to pay for it. I asked the anesthesiologist about it, and he said the doctors just prefer the patients to be asleep to keep them from moving around, but it’s not a requirement.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:24, STARS: 0
Small victories. My friend has told me stories of what he puts up with having Crohn’s. It’s not great. But he’s making the best of it. He’s got a very positive outlook, a new baby, he’s a great colleague. It sucks, but he’s not letting it get him down.
"Textured Soy Protein" (texturedsoyprotein)
11/13/2017 at 12:26, STARS: 0
Did you use brand-name Fleet enemas, or generic?
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:28, STARS: 0
As you there in your gown, waiting to be taken back, you hear all the stories of the patients around you. Next to me was a woman who was in for her first colonoscopy. I think she was probably closer to 60, but that’s just a guess. Due to the schedule, they roll her into the slot next to me after the procedure. The nurse comes in to roll her onto her back, and she lets rip with an extremely impressive gasser. She was mortified, but the nurse assured her it was normal, as the procedure gets you filled up with air.
I was never like that after anesthesia. I just woke up as from a nap, ready to go home. It was pretty amazing.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:30, STARS: 0
Three Dulcolax tablets at 8:00 am, three more at 9:00 am, then two bottles of magnesium citrate at 2:00. That’s when the fun really begins.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:31, STARS: 1
No SR20 necessary. I’ll take your word for it.
"Jcarr" (jcarr)
11/13/2017 at 12:33, STARS: 0
I’m hoping that’s how mine goes. Actually, I’m hoping there’s some kind of medical breakthrough in the next 16 years and I won’t have to go through all that. Fingers crossed.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:37, STARS: 1
Though your mileage may vary, there is nothing to fear about the colonoscopy itself. Like I said, I went to sleep, then woke up and it was over. The Day of Cleansing is not particularly pleasant, but it’s not terrible either. The hardest part was not being able to eat. But you can drink cups of broth.
They wheeled a man into recovery while I was waiting to be picked up, and he was giddy with relief when he realized it was over. I think he feared the worst, then was thrilled when “nothing” happened. Or at least nothing that he had feared.
When the time comes, get it done. They keep people alive.
"punkgoose17" (punkgoose17)
11/13/2017 at 12:38, STARS: 1
I am sure I have Celiac’s and the doctors don’t know what I have. I had to cut out wheat, barely, rye, malt, MSG, artifical vanilla, and a bunch of additives to not be in pain and or get sick and to be able to digest food. (I still got sick this morning from something.)
I had a blood test for Celiac’s and it was negative. I looked up the test and there are 4 tests 1 of which megative results are only correct 72% of the time and they all say if you are on a GF diet you may get a negative result if you have celiac’s.
I hope they figure out what you have, and what you are allergic to, it sucks to eat then it feels like you got kicked in the stomach.
"TheRevanchist" (therevanchist)
11/13/2017 at 12:39, STARS: 0
Emotionally, how do you feel afterwards? I mean, to me, it seems crazy scary. Having my appendix removed seems a little less scary than this, but scary in it’s own right.
"Yowen - not necessarily not spaghetti and meatballs" (yowen)
11/13/2017 at 12:40, STARS: 0
I understand that, what led you to believe that I did not understand that?!?
"Yowen - not necessarily not spaghetti and meatballs" (yowen)
11/13/2017 at 12:41, STARS: 1
Yeah, sounds annoying but, doable. Maybe even slightly interesting Haha.
"Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
11/13/2017 at 12:41, STARS: 1
Don’t you wanna see what kind of photoshop job he does this time?
"Yowen - not necessarily not spaghetti and meatballs" (yowen)
11/13/2017 at 12:41, STARS: 0
I bet, I have a very active metabolism and not eating for a day sounds like torture! Much more so than shitting hot water, lol.
"punkgoose17" (punkgoose17)
11/13/2017 at 12:42, STARS: 0
My prep was different, “super prep” at 7:00 pm and then again at 4:30 am.
"Jcarr" (jcarr)
11/13/2017 at 12:42, STARS: 1
Oh, I won’t avoid doing it. I just get general anxiety about anything GI related. I actually have a mortal fear of vomiting. It even has a name: emetophobia.
"punkgoose17" (punkgoose17)
11/13/2017 at 12:45, STARS: 1
I was too busy eating; I had no food for almost 48 hrs because I did not eat a light breakfast the day before. Friday night I had Lasagna, meatloaf, and rice. Saturday, I had steak and eggs for brunch.
"Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
11/13/2017 at 12:46, STARS: 1
My wife and all her sibs have to get them since 40 because their grandmother and aunt both died of colon cancer. You’re right about the prep.
When ever I get a procedure below the waist, I refuse sedation. I loathe the way it makes me feel the next 24 hours. They always try to convince me with, “Oh, we’ll wake you right back up, and you’ll feel perfectly normal.” I always counter with, “so, then I can check myself out and drive home right after?” “Oh, no, we can’t let you do that!” “Well alright then, discussion over.”
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:49, STARS: 1
I tend to take a very realist approach to medical procedures. “If you are going to keep me alive, go for it.” That doesn’t necessarily take away any of the anxiety, but I felt none going into this procedure. Honestly, I’m more worried about what they might find than the procedure itself. This was ordered, not only because I turn 51 on Wednesday, but after a very nasty intestinal illness back in September. So while they didn’t find any polyps today that might indicate a future cancer danger, I won’t know anything else they found until a followup with my GP.
This was the first time I had ever been sedated, so there was a little trepidation there. You hear (and sign waivers for) all sorts of horrible possible outcomes, but they are all quite rare. The sedatives have come a long way, and the one they give you for this procedure is significantly lighter than the one they give you for full-on surgery. I simply fell asleep and then woke up, as if from a nap, feeling refreshed. Not even a bit groggy. I was pretty amazed. I’m not supposed to drive today, but I feel like I am utterly undiminished from the anesthesia.
I think many people fear medical procedures like this in the same way they fear getting on an airplane. As a passenger, we are completely out of control of the situation, and even though driving is statistically more dangerous, we’d rather drive to feel like we can control our fate. But when I get in an airplane, I put my faith in a highly trained professional who is in no more of a hurry to kill himself than he is me, and the same can be said for a doctor. Are there quack doctors? Sure. Are there quack pilots? You bet . But the odds are always in your favor.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:50, STARS: 0
Sitting around the house while my family ate pizza was torture.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:50, STARS: 3
Now THAT might be interesting.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:51, STARS: 0
That actually sounds better than a day of it.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:52, STARS: 1
You’d be surprised (or maybe not) how many people don’t get them. My father-in-law died of colon cancer because he went for a colonoscopy, had some polyps removed, then never went back. By the time they discovered the cancer, it had spread to his liver. He never got to meet his grandsons because he was a stubborn old Marine.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:53, STARS: 1
I’m going to try and use this cleansing as a reset for my colon. I’m going to do my best to get back on my diet, or at least start eating better. I’m getting fat and I don’t like it. Unfortunately, I like beer more than I dislike being fat.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 12:57, STARS: 1
I feel fine. While I’m not supposed to drive, I feel like I could. I woke up as if from a nap, feeling refreshed. I was pretty amazed, actually. I was expecting grogginess and addled speech.
My brother-in-law refused the anesthesia, not because he didn’t want it, but because he couldn’t afford it. His insurance wouldn’t pay for it, and he didn’t want to pay OOP. I asked the anesthesiologist about it, and he said you can do it either way, but the docs just prefer the patient to be asleep so they don’t move around.
I was impressed by the production line vibe I got from the surgery center. Set em up and knock em down. Colonoscopies over here, knee surgeries over there, boom boom boom. Not that it was dehumanizing at all, just very efficient. Much more so than if it had been done at a hospital.
"Mid Engine" (jdlogan2006)
11/13/2017 at 13:08, STARS: 0
When I turned 50 my buddy imparted some words of wisdom: don’t waste a hard-on, use it immediately. And never trust a fart.
"WilliamsSW" (williamssw)
11/13/2017 at 13:12, STARS: 0
The pictures aren’t that bad at all - as long as you do your prep correctly.
Source: I’ve seen plenty of pictures of them (really - and NO IT’S NOT BECAUSE I WANT TO)
"WilliamsSW" (williamssw)
11/13/2017 at 13:13, STARS: 0
Yea but the alternative is much worse...
"WilliamsSW" (williamssw)
11/13/2017 at 13:14, STARS: 1
That was kinda rude of them - they should have had liver and onions or something... :)
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 13:15, STARS: 1
Actually, I’d be interested to see what the inside of my colon looks like. Not anybody else’s, mind you, just mine.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 13:17, STARS: 1
I refuse to eat liver and onions, so I would never expect them to. But yeah, that was cruel and unusual.
"unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins)" (unclevanos)
11/13/2017 at 13:17, STARS: 1
Thanks for the sensible chuckle from the image you posted.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 13:19, STARS: 0
I looked at some others, but that one seemed best. That image has been around for a long time. I first saw it when I was working as a runner for an ad agency in 1983.
"vondon302" (vondon302)
11/13/2017 at 13:27, STARS: 0
The prep is way worse than the procedure.
"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn)
11/13/2017 at 13:32, STARS: 2
Yup. Image related.
"WilliamsSW" (williamssw)
11/13/2017 at 13:43, STARS: 1
I had one 10 years ago, and they showed me some pictures when I went for the follow up. That was long before I met my wife, so I think it’s fairly standard to do that, at least if anything pops up (I was having some issues, which turned out to be ulcers - that’s why I had one at 39 to begin with).
"vondon302" (vondon302)
11/13/2017 at 14:23, STARS: 1
Lmao. Truth.
I remember thinking”make it stop I’ll talk!”
"ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)" (adabofoppo)
11/13/2017 at 14:57, STARS: 0
No. Not yet. I am increasingly curious about if it will help though. Ohio is only just now getting medical weed. I also don’t smoke, and won’t start. So unless they have some way to vape, I don’t see this working well for me.
"diplodicus" (diplodicus)
11/13/2017 at 15:05, STARS: 0
There are multiple ways too vape, or even eat. I’d look at getting your card. Idk how ohio has the laws set up but if you have dispensaries you should be able to go and and just tell the budtenders will help you out.
"Mid Engine" (jdlogan2006)
11/13/2017 at 15:17, STARS: 1
!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!
"Jcarr" (jcarr)
11/13/2017 at 15:20, STARS: 0
Good stuff. I love the lack of emotion.
"davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com" (davesaddiction)
11/13/2017 at 15:27, STARS: 1
I’m sorry, but for some reason this made me laugh out loud... Ten years to go for me!
"davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com" (davesaddiction)
11/13/2017 at 15:27, STARS: 0
I expect you to live tweet it.
"Mid Engine" (jdlogan2006)
11/13/2017 at 15:28, STARS: 0
“That’s what needs to happen”
"ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)" (adabofoppo)
11/13/2017 at 16:14, STARS: 0
I will wait until after I know the results of my second procedure before I start asking about weed. Lol.
"SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media" (silentbutnotreallydeadly)
11/13/2017 at 17:04, STARS: 0
You stole my avatar!!!