Summoned to jury duty, AMA. Update:  I'm free!

Kinja'd!!! by "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
Published 06/27/2017 at 09:59

Tags: At least these chairs recline
STARS: 0



Replies (24)

Kinja'd!!! "pip bip - choose Corrour" (hhgttg69)
06/27/2017 at 10:03, STARS: 1

do your best to get on the jury and then find the person guilty.

8)

report back on how lunch is too.

Kinja'd!!! "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
06/27/2017 at 10:04, STARS: 0

Geez I hope I’m not here long enough to need lunch. The cafeteria frightens me.

Kinja'd!!! "Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
06/27/2017 at 10:06, STARS: 1

Are you happy to do this?

Kinja'd!!! "pip bip - choose Corrour" (hhgttg69)
06/27/2017 at 10:06, STARS: 0

oh

Kinja'd!!! "RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht" (ramblininexile)
06/27/2017 at 10:07, STARS: 2

How many times can you get away with pronouncing things hilariously wrong before they try to get rid of you? I recommend starting with “jury” as “jory” or “jorby”.

Kinja'd!!! "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
06/27/2017 at 10:09, STARS: 1

To be doing my civic duty and reaffirming our democratic justice system?

Of course not. Mostly I’m bored.

Kinja'd!!! "B/Xmrrmvr" (davidedumass)
06/27/2017 at 10:09, STARS: 0

How much do they pay you?

Kinja'd!!! "Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
06/27/2017 at 10:14, STARS: 2

I suggest pretending that the real guilty party is one of your fellow jurors and that your job is to identify them before the end of the trial based on observations of their behavior.

Kinja'd!!! "RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht" (ramblininexile)
06/27/2017 at 10:15, STARS: 2

12 Angry Men meets Agatha Christie’s And Then There Were None ?

Kinja'd!!! "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
06/27/2017 at 10:18, STARS: 0

The bar is too low for that. They pronounce voire dire as ‘vor dyer’. . . officially. I’m not even kidding.

Kinja'd!!! "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
06/27/2017 at 10:19, STARS: 2

It was Colonel Mustard in the Conservatory with the candle stick, your honor! I’m sure of it!

Kinja'd!!! "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
06/27/2017 at 10:20, STARS: 0

$6. Parking is $3

This is not shaping up to be the second career I’d hoped.

Kinja'd!!! "RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht" (ramblininexile)
06/27/2017 at 10:21, STARS: 2

Plan B: continue with horrible mispronunciations for your own amusement.

Hopefully the trial doesn’t turn into GA vs. Denver Fenton Allen...

Kinja'd!!! "RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht" (ramblininexile)
06/27/2017 at 10:22, STARS: 1

At least once they’ve paid you you can technically call yourself a professional juror on your CV. Right?

Kinja'd!!! "Azrek" (azrek)
06/27/2017 at 10:24, STARS: 0

Is the coffee any good? Good cafes?

Kinja'd!!! "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
06/27/2017 at 10:30, STARS: 0

I wanna be foreman then, so I can pronounce the the yoots guilty.

Kinja'd!!! "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
06/27/2017 at 10:31, STARS: 0

You’re right! Good call.

Kinja'd!!! "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
06/27/2017 at 10:34, STARS: 1

We just had a half hour break, and I don’t see any of the 500 of us holding coffee cups. I’m taking that as an indictment of the vending machines.

Kinja'd!!! "PotbellyJoe and 42 others" (potbellyjoe)
06/27/2017 at 10:35, STARS: 1

I assume petit jury, not grand.

I served on grand, that was a true hassle.

Kinja'd!!! "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
06/27/2017 at 10:36, STARS: 0

You assume correctly. And you have my sympathies.

Kinja'd!!! "haveacarortwoorthree2" (haveacarortwoorthree2)
06/27/2017 at 12:25, STARS: 0

This is Texas. We don’t want any high falutin’ Frenchies in here with your “vwär dir” hoity-toitiness. Bless their hearts.

Kinja'd!!! "haveacarortwoorthree2" (haveacarortwoorthree2)
06/27/2017 at 12:27, STARS: 0

If you would’ve been picked for an actual jury, the payment goes up. I want to say $20 a day, but I could be wrong.

Kinja'd!!! "haveacarortwoorthree2" (haveacarortwoorthree2)
06/27/2017 at 12:28, STARS: 1

The cafeteria in the Dallas County courthouse actually isn’t bad. For a cafeteria. In a courthouse.

Kinja'd!!! "Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
06/27/2017 at 13:25, STARS: 0

So then bag lunch next time.