Some asshole at the bar top just proudly declared, "I've never spilled beer on myself," to the female bartender.

by "Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
Published 06/08/2017 at 22:31

Tags: Nice try Casanova
STARS: 6

Oh yeah? Well I’ve never masturbated in front of a bartender.

Replies (17)

"Berang" (berang)
06/08/2017 at 22:38, STARS: 0

just behind them

"Tripper" (tripe46)
06/08/2017 at 22:38, STARS: 0

Lol when I’m at the bar and I hear things like that I’m like “why do I come here?”

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
06/08/2017 at 22:39, STARS: 0

It is rude to ever get behind a bar counter

"Berang" (berang)
06/08/2017 at 22:40, STARS: 1

or under it

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
06/08/2017 at 22:40, STARS: 3

Pfft, if that was an attractive quality, I’d never get dates.

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
06/08/2017 at 22:40, STARS: 1

The bartender has been one of my best friends for over a decade. Watching her get treated like a slab of meat irks me. I should have stayed home!!!

"WilliamsSW" (williamssw)
06/08/2017 at 22:41, STARS: 2

“Of course, other people spill beer on me all the time. Intentionally. But I never do it’

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
06/08/2017 at 22:45, STARS: 0

Lol

"Xyl0c41n3" (i-am-xyl0c41n3)
06/08/2017 at 23:04, STARS: 2

Well, THAT escalated quickly...

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
06/08/2017 at 23:07, STARS: 0

See my reply to tripperr

"Xyl0c41n3" (i-am-xyl0c41n3)
06/08/2017 at 23:10, STARS: 0

Making me click on the all replies button.... -_____-

Heh.

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
06/08/2017 at 23:11, STARS: 1

Too many buttons for access to non-alternative FACTS

"Xyl0c41n3" (i-am-xyl0c41n3)
06/08/2017 at 23:19, STARS: 0

FAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKEE NEWS!

"fhrblig" (fhrblig)
06/08/2017 at 23:42, STARS: 1

I AIN’T NEVER BEEN TO JAIL!

"BiTurbo228 - Dr Frankenstein of Spitfires" (biturbo228)
06/09/2017 at 03:42, STARS: 0

Is that some sort of accolade now? I mean, I get it. Find self-esteem however you will, but if that’s something to loudly proclaim then it’s probably indicative of not having achieved very much so far.

"Tripper" (tripe46)
06/09/2017 at 07:54, STARS: 0

I can’t keep my mouth shut during those situations.

"RPM esq." (rpm3)
06/09/2017 at 18:10, STARS: 1

I have to think that every single normal human who would react to that by saying “really? I certainly have!” to defuse the situation would instantly be 100% more attractive than this pud.

Also, is this supposed to be impressive? His record is admittedly a lot better than mine in this very specific regard, but I never thought my spill history was holding me back.