by "thejustache" (thejustache)
Published 05/17/2017 at 16:55
by "thejustache" (thejustache)
Published 05/17/2017 at 16:55
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STARS: 6
The title says it all. I was sitting here at work and staring out the window when I noticed something in the street below. Out of the beige and silver and black dots below there it was: a gleaming pile of mediocrity coated in candy apple red, aka a mint early 2000s Chevy Impala.
I have no love for this car. In fact, I’m not sure that it is a car capable of making someone love it. I will say back when it was new enough to get used as a police fleet vehicle there were at least a contingent of wanna be cops buying them to look the part. As a New York resident who started driving when these were the trooper cars, that taillight profile is burned into my brain. I don’t think anyone wanting to pose as an officer of the law would have bought a bright red car like the one I saw.
Ironically, it was the taillights that made me notice this car in the street below. I know the 4 round taillights are an iconic thing, and people have been drawing parallels with them and those found on the Ferrari 360 or even some generations of Skylines for some time. Something about the bright red on this particular car made me want to slap on a couple of Ferrari badges and laugh at it. Then I thought “why stop there - Ferrari engine swap it!”
The next 30 seconds of my brainpower were devoted to conjuring images of a RWD converted Ferrari powered Chevy Impala roasting its tires at a drag strip in a giant “F U” to all things innocuous. That was shortly brought to a close when I came across this article in Road & Track . It seems that under the Lancia badge Ferrari has already built a supremely normal, totally forgettable on the outside, front wheel drive blandmobilie called the “Thema Hellcat”. With a Ferrari V8.
That made up my mind. Somebody needs to get a shiny red 2000s era Impala and do an engine swap with one of these things. It will not handle well. It will probably not be much or any faster than a stock impala. It will not look good. It will probably be heaps less reliable. It will be a monumentally stupid undertaking. It will be the essence of Milquetoast rushing to cast off his timid ways and embrace a new life as a member of Seal Team 6, only to ultimately settle for being the night shift security guard at a small town grocery store. It will excel only in its buffoonery. It will be glorious.
I know, I am a monster. Thankfully I have no money to create such a vapid beast.
"Seat Safety Switch" (seat-safety-switch)
05/17/2017 at 16:58, STARS: 3
I’ve seen an Impala of that generation converted into an RWD drag car with a Chevy SBC. It was pretty much entirely sawzall work, but it looked very interesting.
"Nibbles" (nibbles)
05/17/2017 at 16:59, STARS: 1
I had a 2001 Impala LS from 2004-2006. I loved that car. Roomy, comfortable, quiet and 33MPG on the highway - perfect because I drove 800 miles every other weekend.
And yes I made those inner reflectors into functional taillamps.
"WilliamsSW" (williamssw)
05/17/2017 at 16:59, STARS: 1
This makes absolutely no sense. Therefore, it MUST be done!
"RT" (rt-p)
05/17/2017 at 17:00, STARS: 3
The Lancia Thema 8.32 was a very cool car with an interesting history.
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Here’s a great video on it (English subtitles available).
"thejustache" (thejustache)
05/17/2017 at 17:00, STARS: 0
Yeah, I tried googling to see if I could find such a thing, but didn’t find much. I actually really like people turning cars into things they were never supposed to be!
"thejustache" (thejustache)
05/17/2017 at 17:01, STARS: 1
It really is though!
"itschrome" (itschrome)
05/17/2017 at 17:01, STARS: 2
as soon as I saw the lead photo I said to my self he wants to make a modern thema hellcat. but you’d have to say FWD. but that would make it all the more hilarious. really how hard would that be to do since they are mid engines any ways. just what add some tie rods and cv joints? (I clearly don’t understand stuff some times) but dude. I like the thought! that gen impala is sexy. boxy, round tail lighted sex is what it is, needs more actual sexy Ferrari notes and power though.
"thejustache" (thejustache)
05/17/2017 at 17:03, STARS: 0
You get it!
"Yowen - not necessarily not spaghetti and meatballs" (yowen)
05/17/2017 at 17:05, STARS: 1
This is almost the exact car my girlfriend drives. By that I mean an Impala, not an Impala with a Ferrari swap. Haha.
"itschrome" (itschrome)
05/17/2017 at 17:21, STARS: 0
it just sucks she’s a W body. if it rocked the G platform we could probably correct the handling woes with doing a Seville front and rear swap witth double wish bones and maybe even get ballsy and try a magneride swap.
Or maybe start with a Seville and see how well we could graft an impala body on to it? fuck that’s going to far..
but yeah I get it, and love it!
"Manwich - now Keto-Friendly" (manwich)
05/17/2017 at 17:49, STARS: 2
If you want to make a REAL abomination, start with a real Ferrari... like this Mondial:
And convert it to FWD/automatic using the V6 and transmission out of the Impala (and tell people ‘you like how the Chevy V6 and GM 4 speed automatic feels’).
Then paint it green... and not a deep green either. A wimpy light-green that you’ll find on cars like the Prius:
Then add some fancy wheels:
And add some chrome accents:
Add a fur interior:
And finish it off with some fuzzy dice hanging from the rear view mirror:
"bhtooefr" (bhtooefr)
05/17/2017 at 18:00, STARS: 0
What about going to early W-body front suspension? IIRC that was at least better?
"Urambo Tauro" (urambotauro)
05/17/2017 at 18:32, STARS: 1
Every once in a while, I see one of these and have a brainfart that for a split second, makes me think I’m looking at a GT-R. Imagine creating an abomination like that...
"Kiltedpadre" (kiltedpadre)
05/17/2017 at 18:39, STARS: 1
I think that sounds like a fantastic idea. Due to how many of these things saw fleet use it can’t be too hard to find one somewhere with a blown engine pretty cheap.
The supposedly iconic round tail lights always bugged the shit out of me. As an Impala it should’ve had three per side instead of two. I’m sure there was some issue concerning DOT lighting requirements that required the use of two instead of three though.
"thejustache" (thejustache)
05/18/2017 at 09:22, STARS: 1
Now you’re talking!
"Benny0407" (benny0407)
05/19/2017 at 14:06, STARS: 1
