by "Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
Published 05/15/2017 at 01:26
by "Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
Published 05/15/2017 at 01:26
Tags: but what does kim kardashian think about all this
STARS: 8
Jalopnik: authors let mothers post about their own cars. Jezebel: reshares a post congratulating readers for surviving their “toxic mothers.” Buckle up for Father’s Day...
"DutchieDC2R" (dutchiedc2r)
05/15/2017 at 01:31, STARS: 7
My first reaction was: For f*cks sake, they really cant be positive for 1 single day, can they?
f*ck Jezebel...
"Goggles Pizzano" (gogglespizzano)
05/15/2017 at 01:32, STARS: 0
What did you just do? ?:-)x
"unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins)" (unclevanos)
05/15/2017 at 01:34, STARS: 4
The main victim here is Batman.
"TheHondaBro" (wwaveform)
05/15/2017 at 01:34, STARS: 4
Jalopnik: Dads And Their Muscle Cars
Jezebel: Men Don’t Deserve A Day
"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
05/15/2017 at 01:36, STARS: 1
I don’t hate their bluntness. Most people did not come from the perfect Americana family, and people were constantly discouraged from talking about problems... Just takes me aback at times when said posts do come along.
"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
05/15/2017 at 01:40, STARS: 5
Jalopnik: my dad owned a Mach 1 Mustang
Oppo: my dad owned a Plymouth Horizon
"Berang" (berang)
05/15/2017 at 01:40, STARS: 3
Some writers want to share the fun.
Others only know how to get a paycheck by exploiting the misery of others.
But to which group does Jalopnik belong?
"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
05/15/2017 at 01:41, STARS: 3
#nosympathyforbillionaires
"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
05/15/2017 at 01:42, STARS: 2
Depends. There’s a lot of sifting through crashes and road rage dash cam videos.
"TheHondaBro" (wwaveform)
05/15/2017 at 01:45, STARS: 3
VWVortex: My dad owned a MkII Jetta
"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
05/15/2017 at 01:48, STARS: 1
No wonder they’re so unpleasant
"unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins)" (unclevanos)
05/15/2017 at 01:50, STARS: 2
#scoob2020 #wheresrachel #hotpockets
"DutchieDC2R" (dutchiedc2r)
05/15/2017 at 01:50, STARS: 3
Same here. I am not from a picture perfect family, but to actually put up a post like this on such a day.....naaah man...
"Berang" (berang)
05/15/2017 at 03:19, STARS: 1
jalopppnik is all fun all the time
"TylerLinner" (tylerlinner1)
05/15/2017 at 03:59, STARS: 7
I didn’t read either article, but will gently mention that mental health is A Thing, and it’s reasonable to confront the fact that not everyone has had the same experiences. I’m not saying you’re “wrong” or anything; i just wanted to bring up another angle to the discussion.
"Berang" (berang)
05/15/2017 at 04:49, STARS: 1
I think you may have replied to the wrong comment.
"CB" (jrcb)
05/15/2017 at 06:46, STARS: 5
Eh, I’m fine with both. Some people have/had shitty moms, and on a day where you’re supposed to celebrate moms no matter what, it’s fair to create a space where people can vent.
If there was also a space to celebrate good mums, though, I think it would help weigh things out.
"bhtooefr" (bhtooefr)
05/15/2017 at 07:20, STARS: 7
Except yesterday was exactly the day to post that.
See, for those that did come out of toxic families, all of the messaging that they’re getting is that the right thing to do is to drop everything for (in this case) their mother on Mother’s Day, or (next month) their father on Father’s Day. That article was meant to counter that social messaging for those that left toxic families, and reassure them that they did the right thing.
"DutchieDC2R" (dutchiedc2r)
05/15/2017 at 07:38, STARS: 2
No it fucking wasnt. If you need that message on exactly the same day that everyone else is celebrating mothers day (or fathers day) youre an inconsiderate asshole. If you feel like not celebrating it, how about not clicking the articles? Not supporting it/buying shit for/from it? You know, like a normal person would do.
Also, the fact that youre interpreting the whole day as a‘drop everything youre doing for your mother’ day is quite blatant. I don’t believe in days like that (mothers day, fathers day), but I dont need some bs article to lift me up or make me feel better. I dont need to spoil other peoples fun/days to uplift my own. How about we dont mess with other peoples values and what they feel important/worth celebrating?
"spanfucker retire bitch" (lelykon)
05/15/2017 at 07:50, STARS: 4
The only inconsiderate asshole here is you. You literally can’t even fucking fathom what it must be like to be someone from a family with a truly fucking awful parent (or parents) and how they must feel on a day when most people they know are talking about how great their parent (or parents) are.
Learn to empathize with people you piece of shit.
"TheRealBicycleBuck" (therealbicyclebuck)
05/15/2017 at 08:24, STARS: 1
God forbid that any of them have children of their own! Imagine the internal struggle - should I be angry about my “toxic” mother or should I celebrate being a mother?
"Mercedes Streeter" (smart)
05/15/2017 at 08:26, STARS: 3
Meh, I like the existence of both types of articles. I came from a mother who as it’s well documented in my diary, has driven me to hurt myself multiple times. She’d go about ruining my life, then saying it’s my fault she’s doing it. Many people have broken ties with their parents because of abuse like that. But I stuck around. I love my mum too much.
Nowadays she actually treats me with some respect (at least most of the time, the manipulation remains a big issue), and despite all the crap we (brother and I) had to deal with, we still give her two days in the year where we treat her like a queen. At the end of the day, she’s still our mum.
"DutchieDC2R" (dutchiedc2r)
05/15/2017 at 08:39, STARS: 1
Im in a similar situation that youve used as an example, except communications with my parents at the moment, are at a minimum. Dont celebrate any of the days (mothers day/fathers day), but I do respect folks who do and can fully understand you doing it as well.
"Textured Soy Protein" (texturedsoyprotein)
05/15/2017 at 09:04, STARS: 0
Are you mad because you had a toxic mother instead of one who bought a Celica AllTrac to get home from her dental office in the snow?
"yamahog" (yamahog)
05/15/2017 at 09:40, STARS: 5
I feel exactly what you are saying on a personal level, though on a mod level I must remind you to refrain from insults.
"Captain of the Enterprise" (justanotherdayinparadise)
05/15/2017 at 09:43, STARS: 3
Well some of us did and do have toxic parents. Me included
"yamahog" (yamahog)
05/15/2017 at 09:45, STARS: 4
Ok first off, mild intrablog shitstirring/FP whining is generally frowned upon here.
Secondly, there are more than plenty of happy stories out there for both Mother’s and Father’s Days. Heaven forbid the folks out there who didn’t get to enjoy happy stories of their own can have a single measly article on what can be a painful day.
"spanfucker retire bitch" (lelykon)
05/15/2017 at 09:47, STARS: 3
though on a mod level I must remind you to refrain from insults.
Noted.
"yamahog" (yamahog)
05/15/2017 at 09:52, STARS: 3
Um yea actually, parenting after having lived through abusive parenting as a child is a real struggle lots of people go through. What’s your point?
"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
05/15/2017 at 09:57, STARS: 3
Can you call it shitstirring when what I’ve posted is objectively true? Blog 1 chose route a, blog 2 chose an antithetical b.
"TheRealBicycleBuck" (therealbicyclebuck)
05/15/2017 at 10:03, STARS: 0
I don’t see the need for the scorched earth approach that so many people take when it comes to bashing on their parents, whether they were toxic or not. When they are so incensed about their relationship with their own parent, it makes me wonder whether or not they are equipped to be a parent.
My own father was a train wreck, so I have personal experience in this. The most recent photo I have of him is a mug shot. That doesn’t mean that I constantly spout vitriol about him. In fact, my kids know almost nothing about him and the life he chose.
We have to consider the message we are sending to our own children when we expose them to that toxic environment or constantly rant about it. They are listening, watching, and learning from our behavior.
"yamahog" (yamahog)
05/15/2017 at 10:16, STARS: 2
You seem to be under the impression that personally grieving a toxic relationship manifests itself exclusively as loudly and publicly maligning the other party (for everyone but you of course, who is Doing It Right and everyone else must be unfit to parent), when in reality it’s something that people tend to keep pretty quiet and might just want to read an article by someone understanding especially on a day where it seems like everyone else is so happy and one might be feeling left out. I’m not really sure where all the knee jerk nastiness towards such an article is coming from. Is it somehow hurting anyone?
"yamahog" (yamahog)
05/15/2017 at 10:24, STARS: 1
Yes, because we see this shit literally all the time, no matter the veracity of your statement you are still whining here about the content of other blogs rather than commenting on the article itself. “But I would get dogpiled!!” Not our problem.
Also, your opinion is hardly a universal assessment of what’s antiethical. One could counter that it is antiethical to pretend that toxic parents do not exist, the damage they do is not real, and that their children should not be able to commiserate with others in the same situation on what can be particularly painful days.
"TheRealBicycleBuck" (therealbicyclebuck)
05/15/2017 at 10:44, STARS: 0
There’s a big difference between commiserating with a friend or two, or perhaps reading an article to soothe the psyche. It’s another to join together with thousands to bash on mothers everywhere. The Jezebel site seems to thrive on bashing other people, usually men. Now it seems that they are biting the hands that birthed them.
My mom was admired and respected for the things she did during her life, but the Jezebels of the world would tear her down for doing it wrong rather than lift her up for the things she did right.
"yamahog" (yamahog)
05/15/2017 at 10:55, STARS: 2
Oh JFC. No one is required to praise their abusers. Even if they’re family. Stop projecting your own situation onto everyone else’s and mind your own business on stuff that literally has zero impact on your own celebration of the day. So fucking what if thousands of people are venting about their own parents, mostly anonymously, online? Y’all are acting like they’re showing up to Mother’s Day brunch and pissing in your punch bowl.
"Sweet Trav" (thespunbearing)
05/15/2017 at 11:29, STARS: 2
Listen, some people have great relationships with their parents, other struggle to maintain any sort of contact. Both positions are valid and real. If your childhood was all sunshine and rainbows, good for you. Some people never escape the damage done by their toxic parents, hell some never escape their toxic parents and some deal with that on a daily basis. Some have learned to forgive and forget, others didn’t have deep scars to heal. Hell, I’m fairly certain that all parents, no mater how “good” inflict some level of trauma to us. This variance does not change the fact that days celebrating the mother or father figure in their life (or lack thereof, ask one of my friends who have recently lost a parent) can be difficult to process. Surviving a toxic relationship should be celebrated. Whether or not someone is a prototypical “success” in life in spite of their toxic relationship is irrelevant, the fact that they took steps to better their own lives is. It also stands as a testament to those stuck in toxic relationships, that there are ways out, that it can get better, that you can heal.
As your “buckle up for father’s day” comment (besides the obvious sexist implication that all girls have “Daddy issues”) Father’s pass a lot of their own baggage onto their sons: toxic masculinity, anger issues, male fragility and chauvinism. Maybe it’s that toxic masculinity and male fragility that keeps lots of men from talking about their issues on an open forum to help themselves and other men dealing with the same shit, and instead deflect to the inadequacies of women.
"Sweet Trav" (thespunbearing)
05/15/2017 at 11:43, STARS: 1
We are all accountable for our good and bad behavior, in absolute terms.
"TheRealBicycleBuck" (therealbicyclebuck)
05/15/2017 at 11:57, STARS: 0
“ Surviving a toxic relationship should be celebrated.”
As a survivor of a toxic relationship with a father, I couldn’t agree with you more. But dedicating a popular website to bashing mothers on a day set aside to celebrate mothers is bound to get some backlash.
"Bryan doesn't drive a 1M" (bryantakespictures)
05/15/2017 at 12:01, STARS: 1
You’re not wrong, but this is hilarious:
Learn to empathize with people you piece of shit.
"Sweet Trav" (thespunbearing)
05/15/2017 at 12:08, STARS: 2
Well, first Jezebel didn’t change it’s name to www.bashyourmotheronmothersday.com. It ran its normal “news” cycle, but this post garnered attention, obviously because people had some things to say about their relationships with their mothers. The concept that wrongs needs to swept under the rug and ignored even for one day, isn’t healthy.
Lots of people view people they love, including family with rose colored glasses, it’s pretty easy to justify and excuse lots of things, but objectively a justification doesn’t make an action good or bad, it only makes it justifiable. When people get mad about other’s feelings, it’s often projection and I feel in this specific circumstance, there is an IMAX theater’s worth of projecting going on.
"TheRealBicycleBuck" (therealbicyclebuck)
05/15/2017 at 12:20, STARS: 0
Perhaps there should be a census of mother’s day articles posted by Jezebel over the past week. It seems like there were many more negative ones than positive. I dont think this was part of the “normal” news cycle.
Learning to set aside our own feelings during someone else’s celebration or event is healthy and appropriate. It’s part of being an adult. We don’t have to walk around with our feelings on our sleeves at all times. There are times when we need to put them away.
"spanfucker retire bitch" (lelykon)
05/15/2017 at 12:27, STARS: 0
I am nothing if not a walking dichotomy.
"TylerLinner" (tylerlinner1)
05/15/2017 at 12:46, STARS: 0
After posting the thought crossed my mind that your comment was tongue in cheek.
"TheRealBicycleBuck" (therealbicyclebuck)
05/15/2017 at 14:16, STARS: 1
Apparently yamahog can’t handle the discourse and keeps dismissing my responses. Way to go, mod.
"Berang" (berang)
05/15/2017 at 15:47, STARS: 0
I must have implied something I didn’t mean to imply, but was just making a joke comment. I’m still not making the connection though even thinking if I had intended to be serious.
"HammerheadFistpunch" (hammerheadfistpunch)
05/15/2017 at 15:55, STARS: 0
do you really have dismissed comments here? or was it a kinja’d thing. Cause thats actually important to know.
"TylerLinner" (tylerlinner1)
05/15/2017 at 16:13, STARS: 0
It was the, “exploiting the misery” part. I read into that something about mental health being unimportant, but obviously my trigger safety switch was turned off.
Sorry! I didn’t mean to start something.
"Berang" (berang)
05/16/2017 at 02:01, STARS: 1
No problem. I was just worried that I had unknowingly committed some sort of faux pas.
"TheRealBicycleBuck" (therealbicyclebuck)
05/16/2017 at 06:16, STARS: 0
I shared one of them back to my feed. It still appears there but does not appear over here. At first it appeared grey over here and I thought I’d lost authorship. I’d have to dig to find the other one that disappeared.