Great Craigslist Ad

Kinja'd!!! by "Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing." (granfury)
Published 04/05/2017 at 00:50

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STARS: 1


Kinja'd!!!

Proof that entertaining CL ads aren’t just limited to crappy used cars. I don’t really know what chipset this card uses and I don’t really care as I don’t play games on my low-profile computers - they’re just here to do grunt work in the background. It looks a tad aged, and certainly isn’t worth the $110 asking price.

The GTX 1337** is designed by gamers, for gamers.
Nobody wants a big bulky behemoth of a GPU crammed inside their case pumping out enough heat to raise the temp of the room... That’s why the geniuses over at team green created the GTX 1337.

Running on ONLY the power provided by the PCI slot itself, this card will only pull a measly THIRTY WATS MAXIMUM. Stick that to ameren when the power-bill comes! Having such an eco friendly power consumption, this card only requires a 250w PSU to function properly which translates to YOU saving MONEY!

Guess how many CUDA cores this baby has? Do you even know what a CUDA core is?
NOT IMPORTANT.
All you need to know, is that this sexy beast has 16 more CUDA cores than your current hard drive. Guess how many CUDA cores your hard drive has? THE ANSWER IS ZERO.
BOOM.

This deal just keeps getting better and better doesn’t it?

BUT WAIT. Theres MORE!
This GPU will run modern AAA games on a modest, high quality setting with a minimum of 60FPS*. I know I know, high isn’t ultra... but with our current technology you can only fit so much into this TINY little package.

When I say tiny, I mean TINY.
At a minuscule 6.6 inches, this GPU is smaller than the US average penis.
Yes, ITS THAT SMALL.

Recap :
SMALL AS SHIT
QUIET AS SHIT
POWERFUL AS SHIT

I think I’m done here.
Shoot me an email when you’ve cleaned up your drool.


Replies (10)

Kinja'd!!! "Tapas" (tapas)
04/05/2017 at 00:56, STARS: 0

That picture alone reduced any asking price he put up by half

Kinja'd!!! "TheBimmerGuyWhoNowOwnsAChevy" (thebimmerguy)
04/05/2017 at 00:57, STARS: 1

I can’t even find a “gtx 1337" on google but from my current knowledge of current gpus, that thing might be able to play tomb raider at 30fps.

Well the 1996 version.

Kinja'd!!! "facw" (facw)
04/05/2017 at 01:02, STARS: 0

Yeah, that appears to be a GeForce 210, a $30 card new...

http://www.geforce.com/hardware/desktop-gpus/geforce-210/product-images

Kinja'd!!! "Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing." (granfury)
04/05/2017 at 01:06, STARS: 1

It almost looks like a 1996-vintage card, so that would be appropriate. (yeah, I know that PCIe didn’t really exist in 1996, but you get my drift...)

Kinja'd!!! "TheBimmerGuyWhoNowOwnsAChevy" (thebimmerguy)
04/05/2017 at 01:07, STARS: 2

*looks up benchmarks and compares it to a 1050 2gb, starts laughing furiously*

Kinja'd!!! "Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing." (granfury)
04/05/2017 at 01:08, STARS: 1

I came up with GeForce 220 in my searching, which is still a cheap card. There are a handful of semi-decent gaming cards for LP systems, but this dinosaur ain’t one of them...

Kinja'd!!! "facw" (facw)
04/05/2017 at 01:21, STARS: 1

It is the exact pic Nvidia puts on their page (granted they also use it for the 205, which is even worse). I do see some low profile 220s, but most seem to be full height cards. Regardless, whatever it is is hilariously obsolete.

Kinja'd!!! "THShorn92 - Left his car in America" (thshorn92)
04/05/2017 at 05:26, STARS: 1

Well, 1337=L33t=Leet

So... yeah I’m a nerd.

Kinja'd!!! "veryloud435iwouldn'thaveitanyotherway" (fencingboughtmy435i)
04/05/2017 at 09:56, STARS: 0

Agreed I was going to point that out. The name is super suspect.

Kinja'd!!! "TheBimmerGuyWhoNowOwnsAChevy" (thebimmerguy)
04/05/2017 at 12:26, STARS: 0

I got the joke but I half expected it to be real because cards in the early 2000's had some... “rad” names