by "404 - User No Longer Available" (toni-cipriani)
Published 03/15/2017 at 12:42
by "404 - User No Longer Available" (toni-cipriani)
Published 03/15/2017 at 12:42
Tags: Crossover
STARS: 4
Picture this at its announcement...
Car company exec: ...you’ve seen our full size and compact crossovers, and now, try the hottest new craze, “Sport Compact Crossover” . It’s just like a crossover, but with the suspension lowered.
Crowd: *claps*
Me: That’s a fucking hatchback.
Inspired by Ron Swanson on Milk.
!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!
"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
03/15/2017 at 12:47, STARS: 0
It’s also a Mercedes
"Logansteno: Bought a VW?" (logansteno)
03/15/2017 at 12:48, STARS: 1
They can call them whatever the hell they want if it means getting more hatchbacks in the American market.
"404 - User No Longer Available" (toni-cipriani)
03/15/2017 at 12:49, STARS: 1
TBH I don’t really consider the CLA and GLA to be a real Mercedes anyways...
"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
03/15/2017 at 12:50, STARS: 3
What is real, anyways?
"LongbowMkII" (longbowmkii)
03/15/2017 at 12:54, STARS: 1
IF it wasn’t a crossover why would it have the 1/2” of rugged plastic around the wheelwells?
Yeah, thought so. QED
"404 - User No Longer Available" (toni-cipriani)
03/15/2017 at 12:55, STARS: 1
Formal RWD sedans with a standup gunsight star in the front, that looks like you will be taken to a concentration camp if you get in its way. Basically the car choice of dictators.
"Ash78, voting early and often" (ash78)
03/15/2017 at 12:56, STARS: 0
We’re just trying to sell steroid-fed hatchbacks and you have to go get all Existentialist on us?
"404 - User No Longer Available" (toni-cipriani)
03/15/2017 at 12:57, STARS: 0
Look closely, there’s a shimmer. It’s glossy gray plastic, painted.
"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
03/15/2017 at 12:57, STARS: 0
Dictators, or misunderstood world leaders? Let history be my judge.
"xyzabc" (stackofoldwood)
03/15/2017 at 13:01, STARS: 0
Geez...these Crossover things are getting old and have become the new “Minivan”. It’ll take a good 30 years to purge them from the collective automotive landscape. Aerostats, Windstars and the Chevy Lumina MPV-variants are pretty much gone from your average intersection...can’t wait for these to vamoose as well. IMHO.
"TheRealBicycleBuck" (therealbicyclebuck)
03/15/2017 at 13:05, STARS: 0
Yep. Give it a little more rear overhang and it’s a wagon.
I have this argument with my wife. She hates the Outback because it’s a wagon, but drives an Explorer, which, to my eye, is just a fat wagon. I pointed out the similarities.
Now she wants a truck.
"LongbowMkII" (longbowmkii)
03/15/2017 at 13:09, STARS: 2
IT’S RUGGED GLOSSY BLACK PAINTED PLASTIC OK? It’s for the
urban jungle
!
I DID NOT SPEND $50,000 ON A GLORIFIED HATCHBACK!!!!
"Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer" (smallbear94)
03/15/2017 at 13:13, STARS: 1
Good job. Truck is better.
"404 - User No Longer Available" (toni-cipriani)
03/15/2017 at 13:18, STARS: 0
+
=
I rest my case. It’s a fucking melted Mazda3 hatchback.
"HammerheadFistpunch" (hammerheadfistpunch)
03/15/2017 at 13:24, STARS: 0
yup. tall hatchback is hatchback.
"Fujiwara" (fujiwara)
03/15/2017 at 14:42, STARS: 0
Isn’t this Mitsubishi’s new game too? our future is going to be overflowing with crossovers and I’m a bit concerned:
"AMGtech - now with more recalls!" (amgtech)
03/15/2017 at 16:37, STARS: 0
Neither do we
"404 - User No Longer Available" (toni-cipriani)
03/15/2017 at 17:21, STARS: 0
Well that is what sells, sadly.