FFS, stop putting leapers on Jags that were never designed to have leapers. (Bad language follows)

by "Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
Published 03/07/2017 at 14:41

No Tags
STARS: 6

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“Jaguar xjl 77k miles no issues, no lights, my loss.”

No, buddy, It’s the loss of absolutely anyone who drives this and becomes known as “that dipshit with the aftermarket leaper.”

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IT’S A COUPE, IT DOESN’T GET A LEAPER.

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I can’t... I can’t even deal with this one. Fuck this monstrous person so hard.

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This one is GOLD . A FUCKING GOLD leaper.   Because, you know, prying off a growler and drilling a leaper into your hood isn’t basic enough for some people.

Holy shit. TWO OF THEM??? Arghghghghghhghgghghgh.

Replies (35)

"For Sweden" (rallybeetle)
03/07/2017 at 14:45, STARS: 4

All Jags should have leapers

"Stapleface" (patrickgruden)
03/07/2017 at 14:46, STARS: 2

Maybe the leaper was a sacrifice to the Lucas electric gods to make everything stay functional?

"S65" (granthp)
03/07/2017 at 14:46, STARS: 2

The worst problem facing our society currently

"PotbellyJoe and 42 others" (potbellyjoe)
03/07/2017 at 14:46, STARS: 4

I’m going to put a leaper on my Pontiac in your honor.

"OPPOsaurus WRX" (opposaurus)
03/07/2017 at 14:48, STARS: 4

lol “ no lights”

either

#1: i flashed the car so all the warning lights are temporarily reset and not on

or #2: non of the electronics work, no headlights or others

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
03/07/2017 at 14:48, STARS: 2

Counterpoint:

No. Look how fine this X-Type looks.

"For Sweden" (rallybeetle)
03/07/2017 at 14:49, STARS: 2

Would look better with a leaper

"Seat Safety Switch" (seat-safety-switch)
03/07/2017 at 14:50, STARS: 3

I learned a lot about Jaguars from this post so now I will make sure to only put a neochrome-plated leaper on 350-swapped sedans.

"Stapleface" (patrickgruden)
03/07/2017 at 14:51, STARS: 0

I take option two. lol

"Spaceball-Two" (spaceball-two)
03/07/2017 at 14:51, STARS: 3

I’m no Jag aficionado, but when does one get a leaper?  

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
03/07/2017 at 14:52, STARS: 0

That’s a bald faced lie and you know it.

"That Bastard Kurtis - An Attempt to Standardize My Username Across Platforms" (thatbastardkurtis5)
03/07/2017 at 14:53, STARS: 2

Fun fact: if you see a series III XJ with a leaper on it, it didn’t come that way from the factory. By that point the leaper was a very popular dealer option, but they didn’t come that way from Coventry.

#fuckleapers

"Bman76 (hates WS6 hoods, is on his phone and has 4 burners now)" (bman76-4)
03/07/2017 at 14:53, STARS: 0

It’s a very pretty brick.

"Chuckles" (chucklesw37)
03/07/2017 at 14:54, STARS: 2

TIL that the hood ornament on a Jag is called a leaper. It only took me until the gold one to figure out what you were talking about. Now I kind of want one for my Civic.

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
03/07/2017 at 14:58, STARS: 1

I approve of this message.

I actually like this rationale by the JCNA that leapers are allowed on XJs, because they were catalogue options, but not on XJSes, because the catalogue specifically excluded them. 

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
03/07/2017 at 14:59, STARS: 2

Two door=No leaper

Post-2009=No leaper

"Ash78, voting early and often" (ash78)
03/07/2017 at 15:00, STARS: 1

This has been Metallica March for me.

"TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts." (thebloody)
03/07/2017 at 15:00, STARS: 1

Counter, counterpoint. It’s in fact the updated grill that is making the difference.

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
03/07/2017 at 15:03, STARS: 0

I’ll give you that, because I love that grill. Although I still maintain that the X-Type’s proportions work better without a leaper. I’ve also always suspected that it played some part in a lot of the undue hate that X-Types get.

"Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
03/07/2017 at 15:03, STARS: 1

This one is GOLD . A FUCKING GOLD leaper.

Plastidip. Problem solved.

"MrDakka" (mrdakka)
03/07/2017 at 15:04, STARS: 5

So if you saw a Jag with its entire hood covered with those leapers...

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
03/07/2017 at 15:06, STARS: 3

You mean encasing the whole car in Plastidip until it looks like this?

That’s definitely a solution.

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
03/07/2017 at 15:08, STARS: 1

Thinking about it, I think I’d be okay with two leapers installed on the fenders like a cross between fender mirrors and the rear of an M1.

"aberson Bresident of the FullyAssed Committe" (emaxxbl)
03/07/2017 at 15:17, STARS: 2

you can’t stop me

"Urambo Tauro" (urambotauro)
03/07/2017 at 15:17, STARS: 1

I don’t mind adding leapers to Jags that didn’t have them, but they’ve gotta remove the redundant grille badge first. I can’t stand overbadging.

Either way, I’m genuinely torn over hood ornaments. They’re so cool, but they’re so vulnerable.

"TysMagic" (twjeffery)
03/07/2017 at 15:18, STARS: 0

sounds like an excellent art car idea

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
03/07/2017 at 15:27, STARS: 1

I’ve never once street parked without wishing I didn’t have a ornament. It’s not even the theft that worries me, but the damage that it would do to the hood.

I’m going to be an obnoxious pedant and point out that you get both normally with leaders.

But I agree that new models have growlers that are way too big to be paired with leapers. Although the main problem is that the proportions of the hood don’t allow for it. Modern Jag hoods are huge and curved, and leapers look ridiculously tiny on them.

"That Bastard Kurtis - An Attempt to Standardize My Username Across Platforms" (thatbastardkurtis5)
03/07/2017 at 15:34, STARS: 0

Leapers belong on Mk2s, and that’s basically it as far as I’m concerned. And you could even talk me out of that.

"fintail" (fintail)
03/07/2017 at 15:55, STARS: 3

It’s like a MB with a grille star and a hood star. Just no.

I assume the “no lights” function of the XJL is no headlights, interior lights, etc.

"Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove)
03/07/2017 at 16:16, STARS: 4

Not quite finished.

There, now it’s done.

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
03/07/2017 at 16:33, STARS: 2

Better yet, gaudy lighted grille star.

"deekster_caddy" (deekster_caddy)
03/07/2017 at 16:45, STARS: 0

Do I get to complain about people who stick on portholes when they aren’t even driving a Buick? ;)

"deekster_caddy" (deekster_caddy)
03/07/2017 at 16:47, STARS: 1

They needed to try something. The question is whether or not it was enough of a sacrifice. I’m guessing not. The Lucas gods are pretty friggin harsh.

"Chan - Mid-engine with cabin fever" (superchan7)
03/07/2017 at 17:32, STARS: 0

I’ve been OK with leapers on new XJs, but it looks simply ridiculous on the sports cars.

"Amoore100" (amoore100)
03/07/2017 at 18:35, STARS: 0

2007 Jaguar four-door.