by "Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
Published 02/13/2017 at 12:31
by "Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
Published 02/13/2017 at 12:31
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STARS: 5
Things that have happened to me on trains:
NJ Transit
I’ve twice been on trains that have hit jumpers. And many times stuck behind other trains that have hit jumpers.
One of my trains hit a track worker around 5 AM in the morning. Passenger: “What happened?” Conductor: “A track worker got hit.” Passenger: “Is he okay?” Conductor: “Well, they’re still looking for his head, so I’ll have to let you know after they find it.”
I was once stuck on a disabled train for an hour, in the summer, without A/C. It was about five feet from the station. One guy pulled the emergency door and jumped out onto the tracks.
MTA
Besides the normal public masturbation, being stuck in disabled trains, fights, horny teenagers going at each other during rush hour, and threats of physical violence towards middle aged women (not my finest moment), the one that always sticks out in my mind was one afternoon rush hour on the 6 train. I was standing next to a seated woman who was covered in sweat and sipping some green smoothy thing. I slowly started edging towards the door, because I had a sense where this was going to go. She threw up on a transgender woman, who responded with “bitch, what the FUCK is wrong with you?” and then smacked her upside the head. I made my way into the next car, with about twenty other people. The transgender woman ended up next to me doing her makeup; I told her it looked really nice.
Amtrak
One time going from Philadelphia to D.C., the train I was on had a problem with the catenary and it snagged the overhead wires and pulled them down. We were stuck on the train for about two hours. Also on the train were a bunch of priests going to D.C. for a conference. I said to them “fathers, this shouldn’t happen on a train you’re on.” One replied: “Just be glad you’re not flying with us.
Since this wasn’t my first dog and pony show, I went to the first door with a conductor, so I could get out before everyone else. When the replacement train arrived on the next track, they found out that the carriages were different, and the plate to cross trains wouldn’t fit, so we had to disembark onto the tracks. Just as I stepped down off of the train and on to the tracks, the conductor says “make sure you don’t touch both trains at the same time, or you could be electrocuted.”
"S65" (granthp)
02/13/2017 at 12:56, STARS: 2
heck
"yitznewton" (yitznewton)
02/13/2017 at 13:03, STARS: 2
I got groped on a crowded MTA (NYC subway) train once. By what appeared to be a 60+ year old lady, eating chocolate covered cashews. I think that was the weirdest story I had. Just the usual catfights, homeless guys spitting phlegm all over the floor, ranting weirdos, etc.
"Jcarr" (jcarr)
02/13/2017 at 13:05, STARS: 3
Stories like these make me grateful that my commute to and from work every day is by myself in a clean, quiet Camry.
"Xyl0c41n3" (i-am-xyl0c41n3)
02/13/2017 at 13:11, STARS: 1
This is why I’ll never live in a place where I can’t drive my car. I like other people only so long as I don’t have to be crammed into a confined space with them.
"Tazio, Count Fouroff" (tazio0625)
02/13/2017 at 13:29, STARS: 2
Haha incredible “Just don’t touch both trains”
These are hilarious tales...they’re making working from home sound pretty attractive
"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
02/13/2017 at 13:54, STARS: 1
Not a day goes by that I don’t feel thankful to having a commute that’s car only now.
"OPPOsaurus WRX" (opposaurus)
02/13/2017 at 14:24, STARS: 0
until you get rear-ended by Suzy updating her facebook