by "Alfalfa" (alfalfa-romeo)
Published 01/06/2017 at 20:44
by "Alfalfa" (alfalfa-romeo)
Published 01/06/2017 at 20:44
Tags: BRONCO
STARS: 3
A Dodge Caravan that smelled like something died in it.
A Pontiac that smelled like old lady, because an old lady gave it to me. Not nearly this clean looking.
Smells like glorious, rich exhaust when I back it up with the top off.
"jkm7680" (jkm7680)
01/06/2017 at 20:56, STARS: 7
Is there a Dodge Caravan that doesn’t smell like something died in it?
"Alfalfa" (alfalfa-romeo)
01/06/2017 at 21:01, STARS: 1
This was worse than all the others, believe me.
"jkm7680" (jkm7680)
01/06/2017 at 21:03, STARS: 0
Oooh, that sounds lovely.
"Alfalfa" (alfalfa-romeo)
01/06/2017 at 21:06, STARS: 0
These were the days before mini vans had recessed cargo areas, and a tray of raw chicken slid under the rear seat. It was then parked for about a week in August. In Virginia.
"jkm7680" (jkm7680)
01/06/2017 at 21:10, STARS: 0
That sounds delicious, did you eat it?
jk, was it fun removing it?
"Alfalfa" (alfalfa-romeo)
01/06/2017 at 21:14, STARS: 1
I may not have eaten it, but I sure tasted it in the air. Removing it was fairly simple, however there was no removing the stench.
"FTTOHG Has Moved to https://opposite-lock.com" (alphaass)
01/06/2017 at 23:01, STARS: 0
I think I’ve told this one before but... middle of winter in 2001 when I was working at the garage... local pizza shop owner gets some work done one his car... short on cash, asks boss if he can make up the difference in pizza... sure... next day... shows up with like 50 pizzas every topping combo you can think of... omgwtfbbq... there’s like 7 of us we can’t eat all of them... only have a mini fridge in back... but it’s western PA and it’s 12 degrees out... shove them all in the trunk of this giant decrepit late-70's Oldsmobile that has been sitting on our lot for 2+ years... had some front end work done, lady never came to pick it up... boss said she didn’t have the $, personally I figure she must’ve died... anyway trunk makes a great freezer... after two weeks we get sick of eating pizza every day... plus it got kinda stale... eventually forget about them... finally in June boss wants to move the car before the motor seizes... holy shit there’s still like 7 pizza’s in the trunk that have been there for months... and it’s like 80 degrees out now... draw straws to see who has to clean it out... we all gather round with cigarettes lit and pop the trunk like a scene from a gangster movie like there’s a hostage or dead body in there or something... but mainly because maybe it would cover the smell... and coz we’re all chain smokers i mean come on it’s a mom and pop garage in Pittsburgh I’m surprised we never burned the place down smoking around the shop... anyway the trunk... dave opens it with a pry bar so we can stand back a few feet... omg the bugs... first a cloud of flies then when that clears there’s just maggots everywhere... then the smell oh god the smell... i noped out and threw up over behind the used tire pile... we all just said fuck it and walked away... eventually Shawn and I got voluntold to do something about it... we wrapped the pink shop rags around our heads like bandanas and basically dumped a gallon of simple green back there... it seemed to kill the bugs... we’re able to get the pizza boxes to the dumpster... finally the next week... go to move the car... still smells... wonder what happened to that Olds... left for college before it ever left the lot.
"That Bastard Kurtis - An Attempt to Standardize My Username Across Platforms" (thatbastardkurtis5)
01/06/2017 at 23:02, STARS: 0
The smelliest car I ever owned was this $50 Volkswagen. It needed the carpeting, seats, headliner removed...anything porous needed to be removed. But I was terrified to remove the carpet because one time I thought I saw a quarter on the floor in the back, but it was actually a hole in the carpet atop a hole in the floor and I was seeing my concrete driveway.
Also, my phone corrected “time I” to “Tomei” like three times while I was typing that, which makes me think maybe I need to ease off on my obsession with Marisa Tomei. Not gonna happen, but at least I’m thinking about it.
"FTTOHG Has Moved to https://opposite-lock.com" (alphaass)
01/06/2017 at 23:09, STARS: 1
Rotten chicken stench is impossible to get rid of. I got lazy a few years ago cleaning up after a bird strike test that ran late and just wiped my tools with a cloth instead of spraying them with Lysol before putting them back in a Pelican case. That case still smells like dead chicken for a second when you open it.
"Alfalfa" (alfalfa-romeo)
01/06/2017 at 23:12, STARS: 0
Whenever I type “Bronco”, autocorrect wants to change it to all caps.
"jkm7680" (jkm7680)
01/06/2017 at 23:13, STARS: 0
That sounds pleasant.
"FTTOHG Has Moved to https://opposite-lock.com" (alphaass)
01/06/2017 at 23:24, STARS: 1
One time about 5 years ago one of our managers got the bright idea put the gun in one of our warehouses to keep it inside and put the airplane right outside of one of the high bay doors. “All the chicken guts will keep going that direction, it’ll be fine.” Nope. Despite our best cleanup efforts it smelled like rotten flesh in there for like 6 months. We’re still finding feather and blood stains on the walls.
"19JRC99" (19jrc99)
01/07/2017 at 16:24, STARS: 0
That’s because Bronco is an exciting, go anywhere vehicle!
"Alfalfa" (alfalfa-romeo)
01/07/2017 at 17:04, STARS: 1
Well, also mostly because I’m always typing it in all caps on Oppo. Because BRONCO.
"19JRC99" (19jrc99)
01/08/2017 at 02:11, STARS: 1
I just wanted to use the opportunity to sound like an 80s sales pitch.